(published in 'Chimera' #1, 1990)

 

The major difficulty in industrial espionage assignments has always been the placement of suitably qualified operatives within the target organisation. Experience has shown that maintaining a credible cover story for such penetration can lead to accrual of heavy expenses which are sometimes difficult to recover, given the nature of the work involved and the reluctance of clients to admit to the existence of a binding arrangement.

The techniques discussed here were first applied in 1988, in the aftermath of a conventional assignment which had suffered from some of the difficulties alluded to above. In principle the objective is to employ a suitably charged Homuncular Entity to do the dirty work and report back, rather than a Human analogue.

As is well accepted, one traditional means of charging an Homunculus is to imbue it ritually with bodily fluids collected from the practitioner(s) while in a state of gnosis; the more extreme the better. Early experiments to expedite a business venture by this means were only partially successful, though this may quite simply have been because the task required of the entity was in excess of the degree of sexual gnosis which could reasonably be generated by a small number of people, regardless of the levels of arousal achievable through prolonged stimulation.

The problem is similar to that encountered by particle physicists who require ever larger and more exotic particle accelerators to generate the required levels of Electron Voltage to create sub-atomic entities from out of the void of Chaos.

To create a Sex Magick equivalent of the new LEP matter/anti-matter collider which has recently come into operation at CERN outside Geneva, a new approach was required. Happily, it was possible to harness the efforts of the members of a notorious East London based 'Swingers Club' to this purpose, though it must be confessed that at the time they were quite unaware of the true nature of the experiment that was being conducted.

The scenario in which they were asked to participate purported to be a Marketing Launch Party for product evaluation of a new range of edible massage oils. The timing was worked out with astrological precision and the date fixed for 20th August 1988; location was more problematical, and somewhere exactly on the Greenwich Meridian would have been ideal. In the end we settled for conducting the operation in a factory unit near Surrey Docks to which we had access.

A big sound system was moved in, several gallons of the new massage oil were provided, and, as well as hiring in tables and chairs, a bulk purchase of double airbeds was made from a bemused camping shop in Crystal Palace. To complete preparations an expedition teas made to Deptford Market for acquisition of several dozen cheap beach towels.

The security people who patrol the factory units showed no surprise on being told that we were holding a product launch party and that they could expect to see a few cars that evening. The only moment of mild concern occurred when one of their patrols looked through the front office window to see a young lady showing off her pink dyed pubic bush to an interested conversational partner; it was quickly explained that we had a stripper along because it was also someone's stag night.

The charging of the Homunculus was superbly effective. The grinning entity was seated on the disco platform in the guise of being a wanking mascot, and as the evening hotted up a series of imaginative party games were announced by the 'Swingers Club' hosts. The level of accumulated erotic gnosis engendered over a four hour period by 50 libidinous persons product testing a range of edible massage oils is truly stupendous. The effect was probably amplified further by the expedient of laying the airbeds down on top of the less portable elements of an old Gnostic Mass set, at least there were no complaints about the checkerboard design. After being anointed with a mingled elixir of the event, the happy mascot was able to wank and dance a sailors hornpipe simultaneously.

He has been doing fine work ever since. Plans are now afoot to create a female companion entity, though unfortunately relations with the 'Swingers' have deteriorated. Any adventurous reader who might have some interest in participating in this new venture is welcome to contact me through BM Dazzle.