True StoriesJenny started off collecting some great stories and I hope to continue her work here. I also hope to split up this page. I know it is too big at the moment. Just send me your story at the email below as true to life as possible, and we might put it here for others to see if it fits in. You can maybe give your fashion hints and tips or report anything amusing (or worse!) that happened. What people said, how you reacted etc. Don't be shy - you can use a false name if you like. Email Firefox here to send new material for this page. Thanks Firefox.
On this page: You too can do it! - Phoenix My Philosophy - Gabrielle My life In High heels - HiLuc (with Pics) Having the Courage to appear in Heels - Richard Extracts from my shoe shopping diary - quartz My first High heels - On your Toes The Story Of Shoeiee - Shoeiee And so you think you're strange....?! - Xaphod
You too can do it! by Phoenix
(Jenny's Note: This was first posted on my board and was so good that I have just put it here almost verbatim with minimal alterartion and explanation)
Hello Jenny. You probably recognise me, as I have emailed you before. I would like to say that I think you and people like quartz and people who post on your board are 100 percent right in your assessment of the situation.
I am 28, wear heels almost all the time as a guy in England. I am completely straight sexually, and have a regular girlfriend. But I wear them at work, socially and everywhere. Stilettos as well, whatever I fancy. If I am seeing new clients professionally, then maybe I will wear something more conservative till they get to know me but I donít think that is any different to what many women might do.
Most people donít notice. I make no attempt to hide them either with long trousers. The ones that do notice are women and 99% of the time it is compliments or we just get discussing shoes or compare heel heights with a wink. For example, I met a stranger in a really long supermarket queue the other day. She was just behind me and she said "Watch you donít step back on my basket in those; they look pretty nice shoes". She was wearing 4 inch as well and I guess she was a heel person, so I took her up on her icebreaker and we chatted for ten minutes about how high we wore, why and where we bought them etc. One could never have a conversation like that with a complete female stranger if one didn't wear heels. They would just think you were a pervert if you brought it up, but as soon as you wear them yourself you are part of the club: you've proved your membership. She ended up by saying she thought I looked really good in them and she wished more men would wear them. Maybe she was turned on a bit, maybe not, but people don't go out of their way to speak to you like that if they donít mean it.
I do a lot of things that most women do. I shave/wax my arms, legs, and body. I like to wear some jewelry or bracelets but not generally earrings, and I'm not into makeup or skirts. Basically, I do what I like and what suits me. Look closely at what is supposed to be "accepted" and what is not and you will see it is stupidly illogical. It's "OK" for men to shave their faces but not their legs. They pluck hairs out of their nose, but not out of their eyebrows. They have long hair but not long nails. It's "OK" to wear earrings but not high heels. The list goes on. Discard all that. Don't let society impose its expected norms on you. Do what you want within reason. The more men that do this, the easier it is for others who maybe less adventurous to follow
I did use to cross dress a bit with some success but I find I donít do it anymore. It was just an excuse to wear the shoes, when I looked at it, and now I wear nice shoes and some feminine things as a guy, I find I can be quite happy like that. Most people have a feminine side which they need to express to some degree or other. Cross dressing could be fun and I donít see anything wrong in it but it wasn't really me. Wearing the shoes as a man and still attracting women is much more my scene. Female company is very important to me, and don't perceive that wearing heels will close women to you. There are many women who go for the more feminine type of guy. I've also found that the women that do think like this tend to be more intellectually powerful people, who have cut through any prejudice with their free thinking spirits, and consequently tend to be tolerant people as well. If you are interested in meeting that kind of girl (which I am, and Iím lucky my SO is just that sort of person), then wearing heels can even give you a head start.
Just like quartz, I have an answer prepared if anyone calls me. One colleague who didn't know me well said half jokingly "I'm going to have to watch my arse with you". I just quipped back "Don't worry. I'm straight and you'd find it easier looking at these shoes than trying to catch sight of your own arse!" We both had a laugh. I think if people realise you are no threat, its just fashion and what you like wearing they will soon keep quite and just accept it. Indeed some people are so used to seeing me in heels, they are suprised if I donít wear them sometimes. I think Dave mentioned this aspect before. Like Jenny often says, its not good to wear them all the time, and man or woman is no different in this respect.(Jenny's note: See my boards and other sites for these comments)
Sometimes, someone will say "Hey, aren't those women's shoes?". I might say with a smile "They sure are, we can't let the girls have all the fun can we!" If you are confident about it and prepared to laugh. The other person will back off, I guarantee it. If you stutter and get embarrassed, they have it their way and if you can't gain acceptance, you'll have a hard time wearing them.
I remember a time buying some shoes. The guy in front put a pair on the cash desk and nervously whispered "Errmm...These aren't for me of course". They probably weren't because they were women's, quite small size, very high heels, and in all probability for his lady, but who cares anyway. He was so embarrassed about buying them. I put my size 6 stiletto boots with similar heels on the counter next in line and said "These ARE for me, I wear girl's shoes most of the time". The other guy couldn't get out of the shop quick enough after he had paid. Maybe he thought that somebody saying men did wear heels had blown his cover. But I stayed and chatted a while to the sales girl who was really pretty and had on moderate stilettos herself. She complimented me on the heels I was wearing too. In this case, since I was the customer, she might just have been trying to be nice, but I thought she was genuine. She told me quite a lot of men bought women's shoes in there, but I was one of the few who tried them on in the shop and openly admitted I wore them. She said it was no problem; some women bought "men's" shoes for themselves. So what, big deal! It just shows the contrast between being honest and screwing yourself up trying to hide something. The other guy probably WAS buying them for his wife, but we could all see he was acutely embarrassed and had convinced himself he was doing something wrong.
Sometimes it seems like that with some people who post here.(Jenny's note - see my discussion board) They maybe feel guilty in a way. I think this website is brilliant because it is full of truth and will help people get over this illogical hang-up. It probably comes from early in life when mum might of said "Donít be naughty, boys don't wear girls shoes" if you were playing with your sister's stuff or maybe some other comments that men who wore "women's" things were queer or perverted or some other scare story. It maybe easier for me to overcome because I am a small guy, wear size 6 shoes, am outgoing, and have a girlfriend who I often swap clothes or shoes with, but whoever you are, it pays to sit back and just wonder what all the fuss** is about.
(**Jenny's note: Phoenix raises an interesting point here. Click Here to read more about my views on the "fuss" in a new window)
As an encouragement to people here who might not be comfortable with doing this in public, there was a time when I was a bit afraid as well. But I was determined to do it. I wore 2 inch heels to work. No comment. I wore 3 inch heels socially. No comment. I wore 3 inch heels to work but thicker. I wore thinner 3 inch heels socially and chunky 4 inch ones at the office party. The comments start a bit but it's favourable so I continue: pushing up, thinner heels, take it gradually, get people used to the idea, keep smiling.
Now I wear 3 and 4 inch to work; not every day; whenever it takes my fancy, but that might be several days in a row. Quite often I wear 3, 4, and 5 inch socially. That's just the same as any women who is into higher heels might do. I'll wear stilettos, Usually boots but I do thicker heel styles as well or wear black courts with black hose, but always quite high. Sometimes I'll wear contrasting hose and shoes like women might do with a suit. Usually a thicker heel style in a court if I do that. But not always. If I fancy wearing stilettos, I'll wear them - no hang ups, especially ankle boots, which look good with trousers. I did have some cowboy boots which I wore quite a bit when I was trying higher heels out in public. I still wear them sometimes, but now I am accepted in women's shoes or whatever, I don't find any need to pretend I just "happen" to be wearing "men's" shoes with higher heels. Its nice to have that freedom of fashion choice. I'll even wear men's Oxford lace ups on occasions, why not? They are smart and practical, and similar shoes are available for women which just proves they have ALL the choice, if you let it happen!
Believe me, you are missing 90% of the fun if you just wear them indoors. Women have a great advantage over most guys. They can choose what shoes they want, wear high heels, be taller, alter their look, and get a lot of pleasure from their shoes. Donít think this doesn't happen because it does. I have got talking to a fair few girls on this subject and they'll say they feel sexy, confident, plus some other more graphic things I wont go into. Its one thing having some shoes to wear at home, quite another to go out and meet the world in 4 inch plus heels. If that pleasure is denied you, then it is sad, because you have let society dictate to you over a trivial thing which might give you lot of fun. Luckily, I have managed to free these shackles. I'm glad I did because I met a lot of brilliant people including my current girlfriend while wearing heels, Otherwise, I still might be lying on my bed alone wishing my heart out I could wear my shoes outside and hating society for it.
Instead, I am happy in myself, because I have managed to crush that prejudice in my circles and truly express myself more. Please do it if you want and can pluck up courage. Start gradually and keep smiling: you call the shots. It's a big help because it paves the way for others.
My Philosophy By Gabrielle
Hmmm... I see there's a lot of interesting ideas floating around. One of the most promising I see is the idea that men can wear fashionable clothing that crosses the gender lines without going overboard.
In response to the idea about doing something different than the same old drag queen routine, I would recommend you find a look, feel, personality, etc. with which you feel very comfortable, and just be yourself.
I've been cross-dressing since I was about seven, but always in secret, until recently. After spending three days in a hotel room fiddling with make-up and a bunch of ladies clothes that I'd purchased from a used clothing store, I realized I'm not interested in "passing." Instead, I'd rather dress in a tasteful manner of my own choosing that's not dictated to me by societal taboos.
Think about it - almost no men wore earrings in the mid 1970's. By the mid 1990's, a significant number wore them in their left ears. Now, they're beginning to wear them in their right ears, as well. Same goes for makeup - once it was relegated to shock rockers. Now, however, most men gel their hair before going to a dance club, and a growing number of them wear mascera, eye liner, and eye shadow - even lipstick.
As for clothes, that line is beginning to blur, as well. Take me, for example - I've a slender waist, but larger than average backside, so I wear women's 16T jeans. I'm usually dressed in either a cotton t-shirt, but when I go out, I enjoy wearing rayon - and most men's stores don't have decent-looking clothes made of rayon.
Then there's the heels. No, I don't wear spike pumps or boots - in my humble opinion, they just don't look good on men, regardless of whatever else they're wearing (unless they're passing, of course). Instead, I prefer a medium-thickness heel, either three or four inches (I wear a ladies' size 12, so that's like a 2.5 to 3-inch heel in a size 8). When I'm wearing jeans, I wear a muted silver (pewter?) color. If I'm going to a dance club and I'm wearing loose, slightly shimmering pants, they're usually black strap sandalds. Naturally, in the winter I'll be in jeans or dark pants and boots (4" block heel).
Still, I prefer running shoes for most of my running around. I've worn heels for about two years now to many of the bars here in Vegas, with no complaints, quite a few compliments, and only a handful of stares.
One of the key things to keep in mind is to ensure a smooth visual transition between what's male and what's female. Take my face, for example - male. I neutralize that a little with a close shave, and gelled hair. Wearing a pair of shades that a somewhat feminine helps, as well. I've earrings in both ears, so if I want to increase the effect, I might wear a pair of earrings that are appropriate for a guy, but would probably be found in the lobes of a woman.
Then, I wear loose rayon shirts, usually of a muted color - again something you'd probably find on a girl, but might also find on a guy. I've fairly slender hands and feet, with little hair, so it's a simple thing to toss on some rings, bracelets, and one of my wife's watches. I don't paint my nails, but then again, neither do a lot of women.
I keep my nails trimmed and looking nice - only slightly longer than average for a male, but well within the length of most women's nails (extend to the tips of my fingers, but not beyond, and round-shaped).
Pants are pretty gender neutral, so the trick here is simply finding a pair that don't advertise the fact that you're a guy. Tight black stretch jeans work very well here.
I've never received any negative comments, and have often heard positive comments on my taste in clothes. I've no problem going to one of the casinos in heels, and sitting down with a group of girls in one of the many bars and lounges. At first they're a touch apprehensive, but no more so than they would be with any other stranger. When they get to know me, however, we usually have a very good time and talk for several hours. Often, my wife accompanies me, and it's no different.
The only it's every drawn any negative attention is in broad daylight, when I've been shopping for heels. For some ridiculous reason, most sales people in the shoe stores around here gawk, giggle, whatever. I've never had any problem shopping in the women's section of clothing stores - why the shoe stores should be any different is beyond me.
Thanks to the Internet, I can purchase whatever shoes I wish without hassles. Bottom line - so long as everything works well together, and it's done tastefully, without a shock effect, there's absolutely no reason why guys can't cross societal lines of gender "normality" without drawing attention to themselves.
My Life in Heels By Highluc
When I was around 10 years old, I sometimes went playing at a friend's house during my vacation. One day we were playing outside and it started raining hard. By the time we were back from the garden our shoes were all dirty and his mother asked us to remove them for cleaning and drying. She told her son to put his house slippers. Of course he only had one pair and his mother looked at me and opened a closet to see if she could find something for me. The only things in there my size were his sisterís pale blue satin slippers with a 5-cm (2") wedge heel and fluffy interior and bow. His mother asked me to wear those in the house to play until I left because his sister was away on vacation anyway. When I slipped them on my feet they felt so smooth and the fuzzy interior really felt warm. Standing into them was a completely new sensation. His mother asked me if I could walk on them so I started my first careful steps on heels. Because of the open back and the wedge heel narrowing to a mere 1inch width at the bottom they were not the easiest pair to start with. After a few cautious steps I told her I would get used to them, little did we know how much at that time!
I stepped behind my friend and we took the stairs to go play in his room. I really loved the sensation of walking on those heels. Although I didnít need to, I went at least a few times to the bathroom downstairs just so I could walk longer distances in them. I could not refrain from looking continually at those charming slippers and wished I had a pair of my own to wear whenever I could. I was amazed how quickly I adapted to walking on heels and how comfortable they felt. I liked standing on them and playing with the possible vertical angle on one when standing firmly on the other. Needless to say, I enjoyed it immensely and could not wait for the next occasion.
The next day, I made sure to walk through some rain puddles before ringing the bell at his house. His mother opened the door and noting my wet shoes, the same procedure happened again. In the afternoon, the heeled satin slippers were ready at the entrance and I spend most of my vacation wearing (my first high-low) heels. When his sister came back, her mother bought her new (flat) slippers and the heeled ones were for my exclusive use until they were well worn. What a time!!!
I just waited for the opportunities and took them. For instance when I grew older (around 13) my parents were good friends with another couple who had 2 little kids. They often went out together on Saturday evenings and new-year partiesí etc. I always was the baby sitter at the other peopleís house. The mother of those kids was tiny and she had a wonderful collection of size 37 (my size that time) really high heeled sandals and shoes and when the kids were sleeping you can imagine I spend hours practicing in heels. I knew when they would come back and never was caught (the kids slept really well). Because it came all very gradual and not being forced on me I never had problems accepting it. I lived in my own dream world (sometimes reality) and the outside world never had a clue about my true feelings.
I still remember the first time I was out there and when I hung my coat in the entrance closet I saw lots of nice shoes with heels in the bottom of that closet. When all parents were gone, I started looking television but my mind was not following. I kept on thinking about those wonderful times a few years ago when I spend most of my summer vacation wearing those heeled slippers from my friendís sister. I remembered those fantastic sensations and started thinking about all the heels I saw in the closet and wondering if maybe I could try that again. I made sure the kids were sound asleep and had a better look at those shoes. I discovered their mother also wore size 37, the same I had at that time.
I could not refrain from taking a pair of black soft leather knee high boots with about 2" inch square heel, a small zipper at the ankle and try them for fit. These boots were fantastic and just pulling them over my legs and closing the zipper propelled me in seventh heaven. I went back to the television and noticed again the lost wonderful sensation of walking on moderate heels, this time firmly encased by the furred leather boots. They felt warm, comfortable and encased my legs so nicely that I wondered why boys were not supposed to wear these kind of nice boots, they seemed very acceptable under my trousers. I kept them on at least one more hour but felt the urge to try the higher available heels because walking in the boots felt so easy anyway. Reluctantly I removed the boots and went looking for something higher in order to experience another sensation.
In the closet I found a pair of dark brown pumps with a chunky 3" heel. When I stepped into them I immediately realized the difference but also felt how comfortable they were, because my feet are a bit too high in the middle and usually get sore from the rubbing in this area. With pumps, that part of the foot is free while the rest of the shoe provides enough support and friction to keep it nicely on your feet. Why do boys always have to wear shoes or even sandals that keep their feet encased to the maximum while girls can wear much more open models which allow more foot movement and sweat evacuation?
I now started walking on these pumps and felt the 3" inch heel made a big difference. For the first time I really felt the sensation of what I thought was a high heel and I had to adopt a different posture, with my back much more straightened than before. My spine pressures felt more relieved but I still had the tendency to walk as usual and the heel contacted the floor much to early which caused a hard hit on each step. I noticed when I stretched my feet a bit more that the impact angle got better and the steps got better. Just by standing some length of time in the heels my feet got used to the angle and the whole process became more natural. After about an hour, I could swear I could spend my life walking in those pumps.
By that time, I was expecting the parents to come back so I removed the nice heels and thatís the moment I felt pain in my lower tendons. Standing on my flat feet did hurt, I never had this pain going from flats to heels, was that a sign from the lord pinpointing my destiny? The pain dissipated after a few minutes and I put my ugly boy loafers back on my feet before everybody came home.
A few weeks later, I came back to those people for another baby-sit job. After they left I automatically went for that closet hiding those beautiful shoes. I just picked "my" pumps out, put them on my feet and felt in higher regions again. After about an hour it felt so natural again that I wondered if all those heels were so easy and nice to wear. Looking in the closet for something more challenging.
I discovered a nice pair of black pointed slingbacks with 3-1/2 inch tapered heels that I liked. I tried to slip my feet into them but could not raise the strap behind my heel. I took them to the living room and sat down on the coach. I saw that a tiny gold buckle was provided on each strap and there were a few more holes available for adjusting them. After unbuckling, I glided my first foot down the instep and noticed a snug but correct size of the shoe. I had some trouble adjusting and fastening the buckle to the correct hole and proceeded fitting the other one the same way. I noticed my feet were inclined at a sharp angle when sitting and wanted to try to stand up. I realized I could not stand up just pushing myself on the heels and found out that rotating my feet to one side and keeping my knees together allowed me to put more pressure at the balls of my feet and raise a lot easier. Just standing on these heels gave me so much pleasure and looking at my feet provided me with the sight I envied on so many women, except this time it were my own feet benefiting these forbidden lusts.
Walking around was even a bigger pleasure and although initially not easy, it was worth all the effort especially looking at this wonderful sight through a full-size mirror. I think I kept walking in them for more than two hours, hardly sitting, and started to feel really comfortable in them. God, I hated looking at the clock and being obliged to remove them, rebuckle them in the original holes, and storing them at their initial place before the owners returned. I kept on dreaming of that experience for many nights and still have wet dreams about it sometimes.
I just turned 18 and joined the military away from home. It was winter and boots were in fashion. I found some very nice beige suede furred boots that reached just under the knees, with a side zipper and pale rubber soles with a 2-inch heel. I just had to have them but didn't have the courage to go in the store to buy them. Everyday I passed that store and studied the boots and after a week I finally found the courage to enter. I told the salesgirl I wanted some warm boots because sometimes I had to fly with old open biplanes (not true at that time) and asked if she had anything in the store. She asked my size and came back with some low ankle boots for man. I told her this would not be warm enough and that I'd rather have furred lining. The miracle happened, She came back with the boots I dreamed of in my size and asked if this was what I was looking for. I said yes and she asked me to try them for size. Size 40 fitted like a glove. She never mentioned or commented they were women's boots. I paid and was the proud owner of my first pair of women boots (which I hide in the car trunk for the time being).
A week later it was New Year and the school rules changed. We finally were allowed to go out in civilian. This permitted me to have civilian clothes in a private locker in our 8-student room (no good for privacy). I decided to take my boots in the back of the locker anyway because they were too cold to put on when coming from the car trunk. Each day I couldn't wait till the evening was there. I changed into my trousers and got the boots from the back of the locker. I quickly don them and let my trousers fall over them. Nobody of my mates ever noticed (or said) anything and I was in seventh heaven able to spend all evenings in a "normal" way but wearing those fantastic warm women boots.
Unfortunately half January my departure for training in the states came and because I sold the car, didn't have a private locker anymore and didn't want my parents to find out. I threw them away (I still regret doing that) because I would spend a complete year in Oklahoma. People told me it was extremely hot there so I only packed the strict minimum of clothes and shoes. Upon arrival in Oklahoma we (another Belgian guy was assigned the same course with me) discovered it was bitterly cold with snow. They told us it wouldn't last long (a few days) but because I didn't have any winter shoes with me another shopping trip was on the program.
I quickly found a nice shoestore (self-service with long rows masking the view from the salesman at the cashier). I walked in there during a break in the morning and saw no other customers were present. The salesman was rearranging shoes in the children section so had all freedom for trying anything I wanted. I first went to the male section to check out my (American) size. I found out I wore an 8 and moved on to the female section with the boots. I found some nice soft black leather boots with a 2-Ĺ inch block heel and inside zipper, which reached almost to the knees. I tried them and discovered I could not enter them. I went to size 9 and the same thing happened. That's how I discovered that a man size 8 converts to a female size 10 in the states. I paid for the boots and again lived in happiness every evening and weekend. I kept wearing those boots until they were completely worn out, which was about five years later, and still regret I threw them away. This was the start of a yearlong heel buying and wearing (when free of military boots).
That summer (1972) also was the start of (low) platform sandals with wedge heels and cork bottom. Of course I bought a few pairs and I often wore them on tourist trips during the weekend. They had a 1-inch platform and a 5-inch heel, with a suede top and a heel strap. My Belgian friend (who was always traveling with me) only discovered it two months later when we moved in the same apartment. I always was able to hide it by wearing long trousers with wide legs. When he saw them, he said he never noticed before and asked me how I could walk in them so easily. I told him it was easy and he asked me to try. He really wobbled on them and he gave them back and never said anything about it anymore. When the evenings started cooling down again I also bought 2 pairs of white go-go boots (no heels but I liked the looks anyway). The first pair was of stretch material and reached to the middle of the kneecap in the front (again that wonderful feeling of stretching them back up every once and then); the second pair was all shiny plastic with an inside zipper. +++ Pictures jap crinckle and wht zipper to come+++
Although it still was too hot and my sweat could not evacuate through the plastic, the feeling of wearing them in the weekend was overwhelming and I endured the associated heat problems with pleasure. I finished as distinguished graduate and we started to pack for Belgium. Of course we were only allowed one trunk to travel and because I bought a lot of 8-track cassettes and some good music records my space was limited for shoes. I ended up bringing only the black leather boots and the Indian boots to Belgium (I also knew my mother would open the trunk to unload upon arrival).
We are in December 1972 and I just returned from the states (with a limited collection of shoes in my luggage). Upon unloading my mother asked me what those shoes were and I answered her that fashion was different in the states and it is normal to wear those there. I don't know how much she believed me but at least I had an excuse and platforms started to be the fashion in Belgium that winter so I think it all was acceptable.
With the money I set aside while in the states I bought a new car, an Opel GTJ, a very nice blue sportcar that gave me lots of pleasure. Because I wanted to drive like a racer would drive, with both arms stretched to the steering wheel, and I have short legs, this gave me the excuse to buy more and higher platforms. The car had no real trunk and a very nice space was provided, accessible by unsnapping a curtain in the back of the car to reach the spare tire. That location could also hide quite a few heels around the tire and left the visible space behind the front seat free for the "normal" luggage.
Because my parents lived in the west of Brussels I decided to stay at the mess during the week and only return home for the weekends. I got a nice single room with a huge closet. This allowed me to continue my hobby in private and to go walking around in heels around different towns at night. During this time I also bought a small sailing boat and spend my free time on a nearby lake.
We are now in 1974 (remember ABBA, Elton John, Mudd etc, platform time for girls and boys). +++ picture ABBA to come+++
During summer vacation my parents decided to go to Juan-les-Pins on the French Rivera and asked me if I would join them. I told them I would join them later with the boat in trail because I only had two weeks of holiday, so they asked my fathers sister to join with their daughter and another girlfriend. My niece was 5 years older than me but still single and I expected we would have a nice time in the discos in France, it even turned out better. When I arrived there I discovered everybody to walk on platforms or heels because it was top fashion. I even noticed a lot of guys wearing them (and not only models designed for men). Because my niece was about my size in height and shoes, and her girlfriend was even taller (she was in a national basketball team), and both wore cork platform wedge sandals, I complained that I looked ridiculous when walking and slow dancing with them. They said they did not consider wearing flats but proposed teasingly to lend some of their shoes so we would be at equal height on the dance floor. The next evening, I wore extra long flared pants (normal fashion then) when I picked them up and they had a bag with them containing some nice wedge canvas type sandals (similar to the picture below).
I tried them on and they fitted like a glove. We first went for a walk because they said I had to learn to walk in heels first (little did they know). They were very surprised I had no problem mastering them and told me next day they would bring me different ones because they were still taller than I was. The next evening they brought me cork wedge sandals with a 6-cm platform and a 15-cm heel with ankle straps and asked me if I would try them. Of course I really jumped at the occasion and I was glad I had no problem wearing them or even dancing at the disco. I finally had eye contact on the same level again and got some nice compliments from other girls in the disco. I wore them every evening from that moment, going to nice restaurants, doing window shopping at Nice and Cannes, sitting on terraces and finally going to the discos with those two (not so tall anymore) girls. This was really heaven for me and I was really disappointed when they left a week before me due to their work. I got a phone call from them during that week asking me to go buy some more platforms for them. As we always went windows shopping but the stores were always closed at that time, I knew which styles they wanted. I told them I would only do it if they gave me the ankle strap model I liked so much and wore a lot the week before. They agreed and I had a ball going in those stores. I ended trying and buying several pairs of new nice sandals for them (and for me). I still have and enjoy wearing those cork ankle strap sandals (see picture below) and was glad a few years ago that platforms came back into fashion. A lot of girls ask me where they could buy them and are astonished and disappointed to hear how I got them already a quarter century ago.
Jenny's Note: Luc is a master of some styles which would go great with men's fashions. Check out these examples from his collection:
You also can read more of Luc's story here: Hiluc's World of Heels
Having the courage to appear in heels.
I'm taking up the invite of Jenny to post this in the hope that it may be of use to someone else who has had to deal with the negative perceptions of their interests. I'm sorry it's a bit long, but after gaining the confidence at last, mainly thanks to the messages of those who regularly post on the HSH forum and this one about the enjoyment that they get out of wearing heels whenever they want, I want to finally put to rest my own fears and self denial. I use my own name, because that I believe is also an important step,
I've been a shoe fetishist all my life. My earliest memories are of trying on my Grandmother's shoes whenever I stayed at her house, which was almost every weekend. Of course, in those days, it was put down to childish curiosity and so nothing was ever thought of it. But looking back now, it was not always the way, and even though we now live in an enlightened world where men can gain acceptance for wearing anything they want, providing that they do it naturally enough, it was not always that way. I now wonder why it has taken me 30 years to finally gain the courage to wear heels in public. I can only attribute most of it to the less enlightened parents that I had and their strenuous efforts to ensure that I did not deviate from what they considered the norm of behaviour.
Despite what anyone says about children not having an awareness of what they are doing, I knew from an early age that I was possibly different. Even at the age of 7 or 8, I would spend most of my time looking at women's shoes. I remember that I used to categorise them, mainly by the level of comfort that they seemed to offer, with the flat shoes of little interest to me, even then. High heels, especially stilettos enthralled me. I used to think of high heels as a punishment shoe, provided for the wearer to make things as difficult as possible for her to walk in. My fantasy shoe was one with a massive stiletto heel, and a platform, shaped to a sharp edge like to keel of a boat so that the wearer had almost no balance. Back in the late 70's, Centurians produced a catalogue of specially designed shoes, which included a pair with a spiked heel in place of the platform so that the wearer had to stand on two points. I kept that catalogue nearly 20 years until it finally fell apart.
Of course, I wasn't just content to fantasise about heels; I wanted to wear them, and did at any opportunity. At that age, others didn't have the awareness of what was going on, and games would often end with one or the other having to swap shoes. Of course, there was always the good old forfeit as well, which came in useful many times, especially when someone wanted revenge on you, little knowing the manoeuvring that you had done to get into the situation.
Going to grammar school at the age of twelve had it's own rewards. These were definitely not the best years of my life, as I spent most of the time switched off to lessons and totally bored. However there were interesting bits. The school had a policy of not allowing outdoor footwear to be worn indoors. Each pupil had to provide a second pair of shoes to wear when in the school building. High heels were frowned upon for but mostly tolerated. That first day in the classroom, I realised that I was in heaven as far as high heels were concerned. I was able to enjoy the sights of everything from ankle hugging wedge heeled espadrilles to platform shoes with 6" narrow block heels, and even one or two pairs of wooden soled high heel clogs, very much as they are in fashion today. I knew that I needed to try them, one after another. Every so often, I would make the excuse to leave class. By going down one set of stairs, they took me directly to the girl's cloakroom and the rack upon rack of shoes. I normally went with a specific target in mind, having checked out through the window into the corridor beforehand where they were and normally left my bag just outside the entrance amongst all the rest. When the coast was clear I could slip in, lift the pair of shoes and put them in may bag. At the end of the lesson, I would collect my bag and make my way to the toilets so that I could try them on. Then, during another absence, I could return them to their place without anyone being the wiser.
By the fourth year, I had joined in the after school sporting activities, which meant that my father had to pick me up. (I lived 15 miles from the school). From the very start, I deliberately told him to pick me up about half an hour after practice had finished. The best view of the school gates was from the door of the girl's cloakroom, and so if anyone challenged me, I had an excuse. I started "borrowing" the girl's shoes for the night, where I could take them home and try them on, often wearing them all night. Many times I fell in love with a pair of shoes and they never did get returned, until the day just after my parents split up that my father found my collection. I got the inquisition that night but would not admit to where they came from. He made me get rid of them and I never dared bring another pair home. Fortunately my mother had left some of her clothes when she left, including a number of pairs of shoes which I was forever wearing, often going for walks across the fields at the back of the house. Shortly after, he met up with a woman who had three teenage daughter's, who lived near to the school that I went to, so that I would go there for tea and he would meet up after work. The woman had a pair of black stiletto 5" heels and all three girls wore heels as well. After tea, I would normally use one of the bedrooms to get some homework done in peace. I always did my homework in heels when I was there.
Eventually, he married someone else, whom I did not get on with. It didn't help that all of a sudden, I had gone from an only child to having a brother and much younger sister, especially having to share a room with my stepbrother. Things came to a head one summer's afternoon just after I had finished my exams. It seems that they had suspected that I was going into their bedroom and had set a trap, which I unwittingly sprung. After a massive row, I was asked to leave. I already had a job to go to and had intended living with my Grandmother anyway, which was fortunate, but I moved away and hardly spoke to my father for 15 years. It was only the sudden death of my stepmother that brought us back together.
I started work as an apprentice, earning the princely sum of about £20 per week back in 1978. A large proportion of my first pay packet was spent on the first pair of shoes I ever bought. Oliver's shoes were selling a line of stiletto open toes sandals which had a 5 Ĺ" heel with very little platform. I remember being as nervous as hell walking in to the shop and asking for a size 8. Of course, no way was I going to try them on, and made my exit quickly only to find out when I got home that they had given me one 5 Ĺ heel and one of the lower 4" style. It took all my courage to go back to that shop, and point out their mistake but they changed them without a second glance. Maybe if they had made more of a fuss, I would be a lot wealthier than I am now. I still have that first pair of shoes, even though they are now very badly battered and worn out after 20 odd years of ill treatment. My Grandmother used to leave me very much to myself, and I would retire to my bedroom after tea, wearing my shoes all night. When she went out, I would have the run of the house to wear them as I wanted, but never got to wear them outside except out the back yard of the flats we lived in after dark.
Eventually, I got a bed-sit of my own, a poky little one-room place, but at least I could do what I wanted. I also had access to the back fire escape, which led out to the back gate and the lanes, so that every evening I could go for a walk around the local back streets. I became quite proficient in heels but never really comfortable about wearing them in public and would go to all lengths to disguise fact, even wearing a skirt and wig despite not having any desires as a cross dresser to make it look more natural to the first glance. I had frequent visits to London, scouring through the adverts to find shoe shops that did more unusual shoes, eventually coming across a place in Islington, long since closed. In the shop window was a pair of 7" stiletto heels in a size 10. That was the first time I ever walked into a shop and asked to try on a pair of shoes. I could hardly walk in them as you would expect but knew that I had to have them even though £200 was a fortune in 1982. Those shoes I still have as well, although not worn much these days. In fact the last time I tried them was to take the photos on the stepladder, which are on Andrew's pages. What the experience did teach me was that I could walk into a shop and ask to try on a pair of shoes, which I did occasionally, but always still behind a curtain. The stigma attached to my hobby by my father in particular still remained. Anyone who remembers Derber shoe shops in London will also remember that they did a wonderful range of stiletto shoes and thigh length boots. I bought nearly all of their stiletto shoe styles, normally after trying them in the shop. My one regret is that I have never been able to wear normal sized boots. My feet are just too wide and too high on the instep to be accommodated in a zip up or pull on boot. Many were the time I have tried a pair of boots to find that the foot fits perfectly, only for the zip not to move an inch. I often have the same problem with ankle straps, which limits the range of shoes that I can wear.
Eventually, after returning back to my Grandmother's for some years, and leaving a string of debts behind me, I moved into a house with a friend and his wife to help with the rent. I spent three happy years with them. They gave me my own space, and I didn't interfere with them and made a point of not interfering with their property either. By this time, however, I had built up a very sizeable collection of shoes, ranging from normal shoes to my 7" heels and even a pair of ballet boots which I had bought on impulse from Ritual shoes, because they fitted in precisely with my original childhood fantasy shoes. I had no idea that they knew anything about my interests, until one day a mutual friend, as a joke said that he knew something about me that nobody else did. I knew then that my secret was out, but in fairness to this day, I'm still friends with the guy I lived with and he has never once mentioned it, although he regularly made reference to how much he hates the thought of men in women's clothes. It was one of my other friends that eventually got me to admit my fetish, as we headed for a weekend away up north. I suppose as he had admitted to me that he was gay, he decided to get out of me to admit to my dark secret and came straight out and told me what he had been told had been found in my bedroom. It took a few deep breaths to admit it, but then it was done and we had a fairly long conversation on the subject before it was dropped. I never felt comfortable with the fact that my secret was out, however, and I suppose that was why we drifted apart soon after, despite being good friends for years.
I've lived on my own for the past six years, and now have the freedom to wear what I want around the house and always did. My collection of shoes now takes up practically the entire spare bedroom cupboard space, but I could never get over the experiences I have had with others and their preconceptions about my interests. If I wanted to wear shoes outside, just to get the experience, it was always either in the middle of the night or down some deserted back lane, never in the public view or someone where I might get caught. I've been reading the forum on Jenny's page for about 9 months now, and more and more I've wanted to get the same a pleasure out of wearing heels that most of you do, but never had the courage. It was Jenny herself that put a response to a post about going out in heels about a month ago that spurred me into taking the plunge. She called those that wear shoes only in places where they cannot be seen "sad people", and I realised that this included me. She was right, but I still have to overcome my fears and past prejudices. I couldn't bring myself to wear a pair of shoes with an identifiable heel in public until I noticed that the young girl across the road had started going to school in a pair of 4 Ĺ" wedge heels, which she had been wearing for some time. I hadn't been able to identify them as heels because she always wore them under trousers. It took me a couple of hundred miles and about 20 shops to find the shoe I wanted, but I now have a couple of pairs of 5" wedge heels with a high boot cut, which are invisible under longer length trousers. I can now go out whenever I want to and enjoy the feel of wearing high heels, something that I have yearned to do for thirty years.
Over the past week, I've learnt a lot about what I can do, and that has been a fantastic confidence booster. From the very first trip to the post box, to the two-mile walk around the town centre on Sunday, calling in on every shoe shop in the area my experience grows. I'm learning that I have to slow down a lot for a start. My normal walking pace is fast to zoom, but I quickly found that trying to do that in heels will quickly kill your feet. The first time out in town, I managed only about 20 minutes. Now I can wander for an hour or so and not feel any effect and not have to sit down. I still haven't had the courage to reveal my heels in public, but that will undoubtedly come with time and will probably happened by accident rather than intentionally. When I get the confidence to be able to just sit in a cafť or on a bench with my heels showing which they will inevitably do, then I'll be able to spend a lot longer in them. One thing that would inevitably help is support from like-minded friends, both male and female. I expect it is far easier to go out as a couple or group, where all have the same attitude and can cope as a group with any negative comments than as an individual where such an experience can be daunting. I noticed with interest the get together at the Lakeside the other week. Anyone in the South Wales area, who would like to do a similar thing, please just say and we'll see if we can work something out.
Going to work in these or in any heels is for me not an option. I work in a very male dominated office, with only three females out of thirty staff and only one who wears any sort of heels. I don't think I would be very much understood. Neither is wearing stiletto heels in public, I haven't got the build or the frame for them, although I still love the feel and the look of them. I'm going to London for a meeting on Thursday, and will undoubtedly slip into my wedges after and catch a bus down to Oxford Street. Barretts are selling a girls Oxford style shoe with a square toe and no platform but with a wide 4" heel. I reckon that I can wear those again under trousers and at least get used to wearing a heel rather than a wedge and also get a bit more confidence of showing that I'm wearing a heel, before moving on to the slimmer heels variety which is easily spotted. I know that this is nothing compared with what most of you are doing, and I envy those men who can wear heels every day without any attention or fuss. Maybe one day, I will be the same, but I have to do things at my own pace. The danger of course being that anyone can listen to the cheer of "Go For It" and find themselves in a situation which can put them off this wonderful feeling for life, because they weren't mentally prepared for it. What I, and probably many like me need, is to be encouraged gradually and sensibly to take little steps, not giant leaps.
If you would like to email Richard you can do so here: R.Mcguire@btinternet.com
Extracts from my shoe shopping diary by quartz
(Jenny's Note: If you need any encouragement, then take a leaf from quartz's book. He just goes for it and creates a unique style. And yes, he does post in lower case; he's an artist you see!)
part of the fun of the high-heel game for me is prowling women's shoe stores and women's shoe sections of department stores looking for my pair of dream shoes. i've done this hundreds of times and have had a lot of fun experiences. yesterday for example...
after a dentist appointment in beverly hills i had about 45 minutes before the stores closed, so i decided to hit two or three of the women's boutiques that i hadn't been to in awhile. i was pleased to find a couple of new stores, including a Greater L.A. store which has lots of flashly high heels. the salesgirl there was not particularly friendly, so i checked out their stuff and left. i ended up in David's boutique in the next block. i was dressed in jacket, long slacks, and a new pair of joan & david gray stretch fabric slip-ons with custom made 3 1/2" heels. i took my time and carefully checked out their inventory which included a lot of unisex styles in addition to the heels and mules in there. there were two sales girls there who smiled at me when i walked in, and i could tell that as i was examining their shoes, they were examining the ones i was wearing. one of them decided that i might be a serious customer, so she gently approached me and pointed out some of the sale items. i told her that they were really cool, and that i wore women's shoes primarily, and displayed the $350 beauties that i was wearing. she liked them, and then the fun began.
there was only one customer in the store, and she was just looking. so over the next half hour, the girls brought out 8 or 10 pairs of slip-ons, loafers, pumps, all kinds of really nice stuff, and we had a little shoe party. a few more customers came and went, but i got most of the attention. i took my time walking around the store in them and eventually i decided on four pairs which delighted everybody, and the main salesgirl began to ring them up. as she was doing so, i asked her if i could try on a pair of martinez valero black crushed velvet mules that i saw on the racks. she said sure, and brought them out. i slipped my slender, bare feet gracefully into them and strolled elegantly around the store in these really sweet slippers. i could tell that she was sort of scrambling to recalibrate her brain a bit, because they looked pretty good on me but and yet were quite feminine. i could tell she was hoping i would buy them, but i told her the heels weren't high enough and that i would pass. she returned to the register and we completed the transaction. the other women visiting the store pretty much ignored me.
this is one kind of encounter, not the spike heel strutting kind (i can write about those later) and a really fun visit, and i got a lot of great stuff and at good prices. i walked out of there with a pliner 4" sand colored slip-on with a slight plat, two pairs of prevata fabric slip-ons with 2 1/2" louis heels (1 black 1 mushroom), and a flat-heeled black pleated ysl tuxedo loafer. now... where to put them all, my closet is bursting.
i wore one of the prevatas to dinner a little while later. some guy in the bar next to my table was analyzing my louis heels. i could see he was perplexed by them, but said nothing.
another time i went shopping was in one of the local macy's department stores, one of them in particular carries a lot of fashionable and unusual shoes. i've bought lots of shoes in this store but on one occasion i found a salesgirl who was very enthusiastic about my interest in the shoes there. i tried on several pairs of joan and david slip-ons there, and then started asking to try on some of the more feminine styles there, including a gorgeous pair of 4" high velvet mules with rhinestones studded in the velvet. they were really adorable and i just had to have them. so she brought them out and while i was trying them on in front of the mirror and walking around a bit, one or two of the other salesgirls came over and observed what we were doing. i told them that in my opinion girls had all the fun, and they smiled and agreed.
she brought out a few more pairs, including a sensational weitzman platform pump which i also tried on and walked around in front of the mirror. i already had picked out 3 pairs and i decided to stop there but i sort of regret not getting those also. they were really sweet and fit perfectly and they were on sale. but the salesgirl suggested that i didn't really need them, and so we left them there.
she was so delighted with the whole experience that she gave me an extra 10% off on the sale without my asking. i went back there a month later to see what else they had. some of these places get new stuff every week, you have to keep going to get the best selection. especially in larger sizes because they sell out fast. a different salesgirls was there that day, i picked up a couple more pairs and then decided to try on an amazing pair of via spiga architectural backless glitter pumps with a 4 1/2" heel. they didn't have my size but i tried on a smaller pair anyway, and the girl asked me how they felt. "sexy", i said, and she smiled and sort of blushed.
i don't know if they are still in business or not, but there is a store nearby here called tenplus shoes. they have a website too. anyway i was curious and drove over there. it was a tiny store and i found two women in there, one was a tall german-looking girl and the other was an older darker-looking woman, she actually looked sort of like a gypsy, and had a big hairdo and was talking on the telephone. there were all kinds of shoes there, daytime, evening, some spike heels, all very nicely displayed.
i smiled and asked them "do you get many guys in here", and the german girl immediately said "all the time". i noticed that there were two dressing rooms behind the counter, with a velvet curtain over each. they were really set up to put men at ease in there. i was impressed.
i looked over the inventory and asked if i could try on one of their pairs of patent 5" spikes in my size 11, she said sure but came out with black instead of the white i was looking for. i told her i already had two pairs of black patent spikes, but she said please try them on anyway and see how they fit.
so i took off my loafers (i never wear any socks) and slipped my feet into these beauties. i rocked them back and forth while i was sitting, they were really a perfect fit. then in a well-practiced gesture, i rose up on them straight and tall and had a look at myself in the mirror. i'm sure they were waiting for me to fall on my face. i took a few confident steps forward and then did a 180 spin on them. they women were startled by this, and the gypsy even put the telephone down for a while to check me out. she said "you have a lovely foot in that shoe" which i did, they really looked spectacular. they both commented to each other how well i walked in them also, better than most of the women that come in there.
they shoes were very reasonably priced, but they really did not have any in colors that i wanted. so unfortunately no sale. but i remember that day very clearly, it was a really satisfying experience.
one of my big events about a year and a half ago was walking into fred segal's boutique here in los angeles. i'm always looking for velvet loafers, and i was told that they might have something like that there. there were two girls in there that day, the manager and her assistant. i did find some ordinary velvet flats there and tried them on. the girls were not quite sure what to make of this scene, especially the manager was looking at me a bit strangely i felt, but she was quite helpful anyway. i found out later that she's always like that... anyway...
the slip-ons weren't that great, and they were too small anyway, so there i was just sitting there. i had admired a pair of D&G black velvet 4"+ mules (exquisite, ebroidery and beading, $500!) when i first arrived there, and i really wanted them. they were just so amazing. they asked me if there was anything else in the store that i liked, and i said "well... uh... i... had my eyes on those heels over there..." without much reaction she handed the display pair to me and asked me to try them on. they were like a size 38 or something like that so i didn't even bother. but she disappeared and soon brought out a size 41, which i could hardly believe. you almost never see that size.
she unpacked them and placed them at my feet. i carefully slipped into them and was checking out how they felt. they were magnificent. so i stood up looked down and admired the sensational view along with my two new friends. the manager said "they fit!" i said, "i think i've got to find a party or something!". the other girl said "you shouldn't have any trouble."
so i walked around the store a bit, there were a couple of customers at the other end of the store, but they didn't notice anything. i posed in front of the mirror and that was that, i had to buy them. so we moved to complete the purchase at the counter, and they asked me how i would like to pay for them. i pulled out a wad of hundreds and atarted peeling them off, one at a time. they were very impressed. i went back there a couple of months later when they had a sale, and picked up another pair of them in gray. these had lower heels and a size 40 fit well enough. fortunate because that's all they had. these two pairs are still my favorites, and that shopping day was very exciting.
i feel a lot more comfortable when there are females helping me out. with guys its awkward, unless they've really been around. girls are really into trying stuff on and seeing how things look, and on skinny me, they often look pretty cool. the process of selecting and analyzing the item is as important as the sale itself. also, i go into the stores with plenty of cash, so i'm not just fooling around, i'm really a serious customer and act like one. i think they sense this also, and i get treated with respect, like i'm not just wasting their time.
this mule tryout happened almost identically at another store a few months later in beverly hills. only there was a male assistant there that time. the woman manager (an absolutely riveting beauty from somalia) said "well... if you can pull it off, dahling..." but the guy was embarassed i could tell, and weirded out by the whole deal.
i will point out to those who need larger size (f or m) that there is a website www.designershoes.com that specializes in size 9 and up in feminine and unisex shoes. they have a lot of cool stuff there and are equally happy to sell to either sex, and have been very friendly in my past communications with them.
my girlfriend wanted to get a pair of evening shoes today for a fancy party we were going to at the art museum tonight. so i took her to the better nordstrom's here and after much trying on settled on a pair of anne klein open toe strappies for her. she cannot wear closed toe pumps anymore due to a problem with her right big toe, so the fabric/elastic heels that i never saw her in are suddenly the solution to her problems. i'd pretty much given up on her wearing heels and so i was delighted when she settled on an unusual and sexy 3" pair. i advised her to try a half-size smaller since they were sandals and they fit very well. i'm becoming quite the expert. :^)
i found a pair for me also while we were there - they are the most gorgeous st. john black 3" spike microfiber mules with a wide satin strip across the instep that has little subtle black sparklies on it. they were just heavenly. so while my girlfriend was in another part of the store trying on some sneakers, i quickly got the salesman to bring out a size 10 so i could try them on. my girlfriend does not want to be around when i am doing this. he was most cooperative - called me "boss" as in "ok, boss", and i strolled around the store in them, and they were a perfect fit of course, and god knows that i don't need any more shoes, but... i actually thought they looked pretty good on me, even with the thin heel.
anyway we BOTH wore our new shoes to the party that night! i put on some opaque DK knee-highs and slipped into those st. johns and we were out the door. i had very long gray wool pants on so you couldn't see much anyway. the black stockings had the effect of continuing the black of the shoe up over my foot and ankle so there wasn't any skin showing and i thought that looked pretty slick. a few people at the party noticed (mostly the guards) but a couple of very nice young ladies confronted me at the desert stand and complimented me on my choice of shoes. i wasn't expecting this (i had almost forgotten i was wearing them) and was taken quite by surprise, but i displayed them a bit and said, yes, i wanted a little extra going for me tonight. they seemed delighted by their discovery and the three of us adjorned to a nearby table and had a lively discussion about all kinds of things for about 15 or 20 minutes. this has happened more than once. fantastic.
this is the third time i've gone out in clearly feminine heels and my girlfriend hasn't said a thing. this last time she did notice but we had been out for a couple of hours already and still she didn't say a thing. maybe she is beginning to realize that if i can pull it off it's just some harmless fun.
i went to maya's here in hollywood about a week ago just after the store opened, and she was really glad to see me. we spent the next two hours having a shoe party in there, just her and i. i tried on tons of stuff, and bought 4 pairs of various platform slides. painted my toenails later that day and got half-drunk and wandered around down town los angeles wearing a really nice pair of leather plats, black hose, toenails showing etc... i got stared at by everybody at least a hundred times and i just didn't give a s**t. what a hoot that was
i bought a pair of gucci platform heels a few months ago and have been waiting for the right occasion to test drive them. they are a more or less regular pump style, black, with a 1/2" platform and a mondo 5" high thick wooden heel. i put them on with black hose tonight just before going out to meet the girlfriend for dinner, but they felt better without the hose so i wore them barefooted. this is really high for me and i was somewhat unsteady, but i got through the evening without incident and nobody noticed, not even the girlfriend.
she was in a good mood tonight and it was a most enjoyable evening. i've got to be close to 6'2" in those monsters.
i went into maya's again a couple of days ago for some entertainment, and found a really nice pair of suede plats with those weird exaggerated louis heels - lady kier style i suppose. so i bought those and spent the next three hours of so wandering around hollywood in them, drinking in bars, had some dinner... must have walked 3 miles in them before taking a cab home as night was falling. i was wearing regular jeans, so the shoes and my bare ankles were plainly visible. nobody said a word and i had a lot of fun.
i was invited another time to a night on the town by a woman i know that i had given some help to recently. we finally settled on saturday night and she wanted to take me to this very happening bar/restaurant on the sunset strip here in los angeles. she likes to have fun with clothes and so we were trying to figure out what to wear. she knows that i wear heels (we've been out a few times before) and we figured out what to wear except for the shoes i told her i was having trouble making up my mind. so i suggested that i bring several pairs along with me and we would decide at her house when i picked her up.
so i'm holding some flowers and this bag which has 3 other pairs in it besides the ones that i am wearing. tried to get a good cross-section, we laid them out on her kitchen table. we went through them one at a time, 9 west mule, prada purple loafer, bcbg pump... then the last one was this outrageous ocelot-print fuzzy pony hair versace 4" pump. her eyes widened and she said "oh you've got to wear these... this place (we're going to) can handle it". these are very feminine little beauties and i have never worn these before in public. so i said ok but i've got to wear some black hose with these... so i did the hose and the shoes and off we went. she was having as good a time with this as i was, and she herself was wearing a pair of dynamite sparkly strappy heels which is a bit unusual for her, i've never seen her in thin heels before. she looked terrific. i looked... well... i'm not sure, but it felt great. i had on my custom tailored black linen suit with a mustard colored shirt.
this place was filled with girls, very dressed up, very sexy, and most of them were wearing high heels. it looked like a modeling convention. so this is where they go on a saturday night! the guys all looked the same, standard issue, black and white, short hair, thick heavy shoes (except i did see a guy wearing a pair of clogs there - points for individuality and showing some skin). even with my long suit pants i was busted for my animal shoes right away by a bunch of guys standing in line at the bar, and frequently by others on through the evening. the girl i was with thought it was cool and we laughed it up. i didn't say anything to anyone about the heels, i just smiled and continued my conversation with my date. but sometimes she would say something to them, like "cool shoes, huh?" it makes a huge difference if you have a woman with you.
we finished up several hours later and headed to the parking valet, and there was quite a crowd waiting for their cars to arrive. the shoes were spotted by several people, and i got a quick scan from them. as my last gesture, when the car arrived, i took my date and sort of danced our way to the car together, making sure that everyone saw what we were wearing, and that a man could move gracefully in heels. what fun. let's do it again real soon.
My First High Heels! by On Your toes
Well, here's the true story of:"My First Real High Heels" I'm not sure exactly when my fascination with high heels really began. Maybe it was when I was 4 or so. I was just about to put on a pair of my mothers heels when she came in and told me to stay out of her closet. Maybe if I had put them on it would have ended rightthere. My cousin had a pair of cowboy boots that I used to plot to get to wear. Sometimes I'd go to his house when I knew he wasn't home and tell his mother we were working on a model plane and I wanted to get started on the next step. I never got caught, but never got to wear them for more than a few minutes before I was sure my cousin would come running into the room.
Fast forwarding a couple years I was visiting a friend and noticed a pair of his sister's heels in the bathroom. Friend's sister's shoes seem to figure into a lot of stories like mine that I've read over the years. The family started to wonder if I was sick that evening. I must have "gone to the bathroom" 10 times. They were almost my size and I eventually managed tosteal them! They were sandals and really too small so my feet stuck out about a half inch over the backs. The heels weren't very high either. This lead me to decide that if I wanted real heels, then I had to buy them.
About a year later, maybe age 15, one evening I went to a discount department store on the other side of town and bought a pair of red 3 inch heel pointed toe pumps, size 10-the largest they had. I must have circled around the shoe department for an hour waiting for nobody to be around. When I got to the register, it turned out they were unpriced so the cashier held them up high and shouted "Doris, how much are these spike heels!?" Managing to keep from passing out I paid the $3.97 and as she was putting them in the bag, I noticed that in my nervousness, I grabbed a pair of size 7! I nearly died. Being in this deep, I walked in a daze to the returns counter and managed to stutter out something about my sister buying the wrong size. Of course the clerk just doing her job, probably didn't even notice that I was a guy returning "ladies" shoes. She pulled out a form and said "name, address, and phone number." Willing to do anything to get out of there I wrote my real information. I'm still waiting for them to call my mother and that was almost 40 years ago.
I went back and got the right shoes this time, paid without incident and was going out the door when I saw MY HOME ROOM TEACHER coming towards the entrance. I was sure that somehow the bag had turned transparent or the outline of the shoes was clearly visible. So not only was the store going to call my home, but I was probably going to get thrown out of school. Well, at least that's how I felt at that moment. It was about a half hour walk home. I was about halfway there when it started raining. I didn't care if I got wet but bags were paper back then, and the bag startedto get awfully wet. Then I ran into a couple friends from school. They said "Hey, what'd ya buy?" and I said oh, just a toy for my little brother. While we were talking I noticed that one of the spike heels had poked its way out of the wet bag and was clearly visible. They seemed to just keep talking and talking while I stood there just nodding my head sure they were about to start screaming "look at those heels!" Once again nothing happened. I got home and sneaked the shoes into the cellar. I was too jangled from all the close calls to risk even opening the bag for fear the family would come running down to see what the noise was.
Eventually I realized that people hardly ever look at feet so I started taking long night walks around my residential part of the city. Rainy nights were best because there we fewer people out, it seemed darker, and the rain drowned out much of the sound of the metaltipped spikes. When winter came, I bought a pair of "Rain Dears" brand overshoes. They were translucent plastic and made for high heels. They had a metal reinforcement inside the heel which kept the spike from poking through, and pointed toes. They really didn't look like heels and were very quiet so I wore them a lot. Those shoes are long since gone.
In the almost 40 years since then I've probably owned 500 pairs of shoes. I have owned or still own: pumps, clogs, sandals, spike heels, wedge heels, wide heels, flat heels, every conceivable heel height from flat to 6 inches, snow boots, fashion boots, cowboy boots, Dutch wooden shoes, Chinese cotton shoes, Japanese geta, lace up, zip up, Velcro up, pull up, elastic sides, cork soles, plastic soles, wooden soles, leather soles, 39 cent flip-flops, $400 custom cowboy boots, every color ever made, a lot of combinations of everything in this list, and that holy grail of shoe fetishists everywhere-the pointe ballet shoe with an 8 inch spike heel.... to be continued.
The Story Of Shoeiee
It all started when I was about 9 years old I guess. My cousin had moved in with us and it was the wild 70's. And she was a wild child! I don't really remember too much since this was nearly 20 years ago, but I do remember her coming in late from the bars wearing her leopard print thigh high stiletto boots. At that time, I didn't really understand my fascination with her shoes, but now, the one thing I clearly remember as she stepped out of her date's car that night was the boots. So I guess that's the real beginning of my life so far in High Heels.
Fast-forward about 4 years...We had moved into a new house and I was a curious 13 years old. I played like all the other boys, with bikes and roller-skates and everything under the sun. But when my roller skates broke I tried to find new bolts for the trucks. The closest thing I could find was a couple of old bicycle axles. To see if the threads fit, I screwed the axle into the rear truck mounting hole on the skates. Oops...I just made my first High Heel!! Over the course of the next few months, I wore them so much (always in hiding!!) that I eventually broke the plastic holding the threads for the axles and that ended those oddball shoes.
About a year later my grandmother brought over a couple bags of her old clothes so we could go through them and what we decided not to keep would go to Goodwill. In one of those bags was a pair of red 3.5" strappy sandals in size 7. My feet were nearly a men's size 8 by then so they came close to fitting but were too narrow in the toes. I could just barely get my toes in between the straps in the front, which made the heel of my feet stick over the back pretty bad. Also, I could not put the straps around my ankles properly so to hold them on, I put socks on over them. Hey...It worked!! I played around with these for almost a year in the house and mom knew about them. Heck!! She cleaned my room up and you know you can't hide anything from a motherly cleaning!! About a year later though is when I got my first pair of 'real' High Heels.
On a Christmas shopping trip with mom, we went to a K Mart and I got to shop and pay for my items alone. In my bin I had a pair of white plastic mules with a leather strap across the toes with about a 3" heel in size 11. I bought them and hurriedly ran my purchases out to the van and hid everything, especially the heels. I wore those shoes out completely!!
When I was 15, I got a motorcycle's license and that was the beginning of owning really high heels. The freedom to go where I wanted gave me the opportunity to really look for shoes that fit. I found a little shoe store in the Cuban part of Miami that carried the larger sizes and purchased a pair of 5 1/2" stilettos one day after school. When I got home I couldn't help but hurry to my room and give them a try!! Our home had wood floors that echoed everything!! But fortunately, I had my own 3/4 bathroom with a rug. As soon as I got in there I tried them on and couldn't even stand in them!! What a thrill!! During the next two years I purchased a total of three pair I think. I learned about Payless Shoe Source and bought some lower heels but the 5 1/2" heels were a true challenge!
When I started attending college in South Dade County, I had a car and would drive to and from school wearing them. My school was next to a large park, so sometimes I would go there during my breaks and just wear my shoes. If I were there after dark, sometimes I would walk around the park some too. Of course, at home I would sleep in them just about every night. During that year, I started to seriously look for stores that carried the larger sizes as I was leveling off at my size 12-13 by then and found a couple that carried the very high heels. Since money was tight, I would have to save for months to get each pair and had acquired about four pair before moving to the mountains of North Carolina the next year.
By the time I got to NC, I had developed a strong liking for ever increasing challenges, and wearing 5+" heels on steep mountain trails and in snow and ice really got me going. I lived there for three years and loved every minute of it! My first year up there I got heavily involved in the Southern Baptist faith and threw all my heels away after doing too much thinking. I felt they were 'Un Godly' for a Christian man to wear. I literally threw out over $300 worth of shoes. Left them in a garbage can on the side of the Blue Ridge Parkway. The next day I was so distraught that I went back there looking for them but too late. They were gone! To say the least, that summer, when I returned home, it was off to find the shoe stores I had bought from before! The next year was pretty much the same as the first with two exceptions. 1.) this time I didn't throw any shoes away :-) and 2.) When I returned home for Thanksgiving, I left a pair of 5" pumps under my bed. Well, my sister thought it would be nice to give my room a thorough cleaning and she found them!! That night I got a call from home asking all kinds of questions!! I replied that it was 'only a stage' and they can 'throw them away if they liked.' They did, but I still had several pairs to wear :-)
For my third year there, I had my own apartment and wore my heels all the time when home. The desire to wear them outside was starting to get to me so I bought some women's clothes and played around with cross dressing a bit to enable me to wear them publicly. This never satisfied me as I have very masculine facial features that could be spotted a mile away. I tried to cover this with make-up but still, no luck. At the end of my third year, I moved back to S. Florida to help with the family business.
Living back in the family home made it hard to wear my favorite style of shoes and I wound up wearing them primarily at our business' warehouse. This is where I learned about oil on different surfaces and the joys of slipping and sliding in 5+" heels. It was also the only place I could practice applying make-up in an attempt to finally go out 'dressed' just to be able to wear my heels. One time, while fully dressed-up, my dad unexpectedly pulled up!! Here I was, 22 years old, living and working with my parents, and in the company warehouse wearing a skirt and blouse with stuffed bra and makeup. Not to mention my 5" Knee High Go Go boots! BUSTED!! I ran to the bathroom at the back of the warehouse while he came in and quickly changed into my regular clothes and washed my face. Definitely qualifies as a 'Most Embarrassing Moment!!' Shortly after that, I moved out on my own (unrelated...) and since then have gradually built my collection to nearly 30 pairs.
In the last year, I have started really accepting and opening up about my fetish for heels to a few select friend. I have made several trips from VA (where I now live) to FL wearing my 5" Stiletto Ankle Boots and have gone into an outlet mall with a couple friends wearing my 5 1/2Ē Stiletto Thigh Highs under my jeans. I have never worn my heels under 'normal' length pants as only until recently have I bought any that are more unisex. Currently, my foot's in a cast and once that's off, I will be wearing my unisex shoes daily. So far, I have worn up to 4" chunky heeled boots with my cast and have had no comments either way. Let's see what happens when I can wear them all the time!! (And in pairs!!)
And so you think you're strange....?!
You may remember I said I would not drag some poor unfortunate off to the Boat Show, on one of our heely outings. I did not say I would not write about it!
I sometimes go up to the boat show when I need bits of kit to keep my old tub afloat. Things are getting serious because I'm talking about replacing that nasty, expensive to repair, Volvo heap of an engine.
So, putting on my soft leather jeans and 4" block heels, I strode off to the show. Entertainment getting there was in the shape of another passenger on the train, namely the antics of a 'care in the community' mentally ill person who, after effing and blinding at his newspaper, proceeded to shred it into tiny pieces and tidily put them in a carrier bag. (I can now see why people like the privacy of their cars).
At the show, I headed off to the engine manufacturers. Most were helpful, only stealing glances at my heels when they thought I didn't know, but, hell, I'm just about to part with 4000 pounds, so what do they care. Actually some salesmen/women still persist in evaluating their customer by their shoes .... well I totally screwed up their cynical little games!
The best chap I caught out staring at my heels was at the 'Yachting Monthly' stand. They were handing out carrier bags to cart the incredible amount of bumf one collects at these events. I had already scrounged a 'Practical Boat Owner' carrier, showing my affiliation to the contingent of yachties who spend more time worrying about keeping it seaworthy, than the necessity of having a second GPS repeater on the flybridge. One of the girls had offered me a carrier as I walked by, but I declined. Changing my mind, a few yards past their stand I did a swift 180 degree pirouette to say to the lass, "sorry I've already got a bag from the opposition," and caught the guy next to her in a full, dropped-jaw, gawp at the heels. He was embarrassed; I wasn't!
King's Rd was on the way back so I did a quick heely run down as far as the Register Office (famous for the number of pop stars who were married there, Mick Jagger and the odd Beatle, et al). There wasn't too much I havn't seen before, except for 'R. Soles', a cowboy boot shop, which used to have some 4.5" heels, but alas, no longer.
Hoping for less 'entertainment' on the train journey back, I parked myself down next to a well-dressed older lady who, with metronomic accuracy, proceeded to fart every three minutes from London to Guildford. Merely wearing 4" heels does not, in British society, qualify you as being eccentric, especially when you have to compete with newspaper-demolishing loonies and farting dowagers!
More Stories coming soon