Two old ladies were outside their nursing home having a smoke when it
started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the
end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.

Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and 
announces to the pharmacist that she wants a package of condoms.

The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80
years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.

Lady 1: It doesn't matter as long as it fits a Camel.

The pharmacist fainted.