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George W. Bush and Condoleezza Rice have a special understanding of foreign affairs:
(With thanks to Newsnight e-mails to Jeremy Paxman. From a correspondent in Switzerland).

George:   Condi!  Nice to see you.  What's happening?
Condi:      Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George:   Great.  Lay it on me.
Condi:      Hu is the new leader of China.
George:   That's what I want to know.
Condi:      That's what I'm telling you.
George:   That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi:      Yes.
George:    I mean the fellow's name.
Condi:       Hu.
George:    The guy in China.
Condi:       Hu.
George:    The new leader of China.
Condi:       Hu.
George:    The Chinaman!
Condi:       Hu is leading China.
George:    Now whaddya'  asking me for?
Condi:       I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
George:    Well, I'm asking you.   Who is leading China?
Condi:      That's the man's name.
George:   That's who's name?
Condi:      Yes.
George:   Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi:      Yes, sir.
George:   Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China?   I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condi:      That's correct.
George:   Then who is in China?
Condi:      Yes, sir.
George:   Yassir is in China?
Condi:      No, sir.
George:   Then who is?
Condi:      Yes, sir.
George:   Yassir?
Condi:      No, sir.
George:   Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China.  Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi:      Kofi?
George:   No, thanks.
Condi:      You want Kofi?
George:   No.
Condi:      You don't want Kofi?
George:   No.  But now that you mention it,   I could use a glass of milk.     And then get me the UN.
Condi:     Yes, sir.
George:   Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi:      Kofi?
George:   Milk!   Will you please make the call?
Condi:     And call who?
George:   Who is the guy at the UN?
Condi:     Hu is the guy in China.
George:   Will you stay out of China?!
Condi:      Yes, sir.
George:   And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the UN.
Condi:     Kofi.
George:   All right! With cream and two sugars.  Now get on the phone.
               (Condi picks up the phone)
Condi:     Rice here.
George:   Rice?  Good idea.   And a couple of egg rolls, too.

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