ContentsBackgroundThe format is based on the BBC2 TV news programme Newsnight - sometimes presented by Kirsty Wark. The idea for starting Kirsty's intro with a line from a pop song is a homage to one of our favourite comedy programmes - BBC2's Dead Ringers which uses the same device in its spoof of Newsnight. As its based on a news programme we tend to work topical references in (which then need to be re-worked if you use the sketch) - in this instance a reference to the imminent war in Iraq!Rating
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StagingTV style interview - ideally behind a desk/table.ScriptVoiceover: Next on BBC2 [Babylonian Broadcasting Corporation obviously!] Newsnight with Kirsty Squawk.Kirsty: Gold. Always believe in your soul. You have the power to know you're indestructible. More on that story later. But first the crisis in Babylon. A king on the edge and a government in disarray. Can one dream cause so much damage? With the price of gold soaring as there are rumours that the government are stock-piling reserves we ask: can the king really execute the entire ruling party just because they won't interpret a dream? To help us through the tangled web of court intrigue we have with us tonight an insider - Magus Meanor a member of the Amalgamated Party of Astrologers, Enchanters, Magicians and Sorcerers. Mr Meanor, good evening, Meanor: Good evening Kirsty: How did the government get in such a mess and in such dire conflict with the monarch? Meanor: Well Kirsty, as you know, it began some days ago when Nebuchadnezzar himself summoned government ministers to court as he had had a dream which disturbed him greatly. Kirsty: No big problem then. Dreams are a specialty of the Amalgamated Party are they not? Meanor: When presented with a dream to interpret that is exactly right. But here is the root of the current crisis. The king has consistently refused to tell us what the dream is! He says he will only believe the interpretation if we are able to tell him what the dream was as well. Kirsty: But that's impossible isn't it? Meanor: Of course it is. No-one can reveal it to the king except the gods. We're good -but we're not that good. We can give the king a full and immediate interpretation - but only with his cooperation. Our attempts to negotiate have failed as, unfortunately, it seems the king has descended into some kind of paranoid delusion . Kirsty: Are you saying that Nebuchadnezzar is mad? Meanor: He's furious, Kirsty! Kirsty: So he is taking rather extreme measures Meanor: Indeed. I haven't slept a wink all night. We're all living under the threat of death as we speak. Kirsty: I see. So heads may roll, quite literally, then. What are you going to do? Meanor: Well, it seems that one of our newest members, a young Hebrew called Daniel Belteshazzar, has successfully appealed to the king for a stay of execution in order that he, and three of his closest associates, can pray to their God for a revelation. Kirsty: I see, desperate times call for desperate measures I suppose. Does he stand a chance? Meanor: We can only hope so. I'm prepared to try anything. Frankly, we are clinging to the hope that we can persuade the king to see reason and step back from the brink. But it is hope rather than expectation. Kirsty: Who has ever heard of a leader continuing down such a destructive path despite so much opposition from within his own government? [Pause. Puts finger to ear as if listening to producer] Well I believe we can go over now live to Andrew Mark our chief political correspondent who has some breaking news for us. Andrew, what can you tell us. Andrew: Some quite extraordinary scenes of jubilation at court this evening Kirsty. It appears that Daniel Belteshazzar has actually succeeded. He's done it - the Amalgamated Party are off the hook. Incredibly, as well as interpreting the dream Daniel has crucially been able to tell the king what his dream was in the first place! Kirsty: That's amazing, how did he do it?. Andrew: Well I've just spoken to a government minister and apparently Daniel boldly told the king that he was unable to tell the king his dream or interpret it but that his God - The God of Heaven and Revealer of Mysteries could - and had. As Daniel went on to reveal the dream and its meaning the king was apparently stunned by these revelations and fell to his knees. He praised Daniel's God as the God of gods and Lord of kings. He then promoted Daniel to the Cabinet with immediate affect. A move that would normally have thrown the Amalgamated Party into turmoil. But as Daniel has just saved everyone's life I think he'll get away with it. Kirsty: So the 64 thousand shekel question is - what was the dream and its interpretation? Andrew: Apparently Nebuchadnezzar dreamt of a huge statue. With a head of gold, a torso of silver, thighs of bronze and legs of iron but with feet of clay - the clay being mixed in with the iron. Then a huge rock was carved out - but not by human hands - and this then smashed into the feet of the statue which disintegrated into dust. Meanwhile the rock grew to a huge mountain covering the whole earth. Kirsty: Well that would have disturbed me if I'd dreamt it. What did Daniel say it meant? Andrew: This was political dynamite Kirsty. According to Daniel the dream foretells the demise of Nebuchadnezzar's kingdom (represented by the gold head). He will be superseded by another kingdom (the silver torso), then a third (the bronze thighs) and finally by a fourth kingdom that will be strong like iron but disunited (the mixture with clay). Then the rock is the Kingdom of God which will overcome all earthly rule and transform the entire world. An unprecedented prophecy. Amazing. This story is going to run and run. Kirsty: But bad news in there for the United Kingdom of Babylonia - might this mean we are on the brink of war Andrew? Andrew: Its difficult to say at this stage, though the king himself, apparently, said that this did not mean war was inevitable. Kirsty: Well I'm afraid that's all we have time for. Don't forget to check out our website at www.bbc.bab/newsnight. Goodnight. Copyright © 2003 Jane And Mark Lewis. http://www.pottedjam.org Email: sketches@pottedjam.org Back to Top Back to Drama Homepage |
