And just for you hairy bikers, or ex-bikers, here are the words of a piece of motor-bike history:

The Terror of Highway 101

He wore black denim trousers and motorcycle boots
And a black leather jacket with an eagle on the back
He had a hopped-up sickle that took off like a gun
That fool was the terror of Highway 101

Well, he never washed his face and he never combed his hair
He had axle grease imbedded underneath his fingernails
On the muscle of his arm was a red tattoo
A picture of a heart saying, "Mother, I love you"

He had a pretty girlfriend by the name of Mary Lou
But he treated her just like he treated all the rest
And everybody pitied her and everybody knew
He loved that doggone motorcycle best

He wore black denim trousers and motorcycle boots
And a black leather jacket with an eagle on the back
He had a hopped-up sickle that took off like a gun
That fool was the terror of Highway 101

Mary Lou, poor girl, she pleaded and she begged him not to leave
She said, "I've got a feeling if you ride tonight I'll grieve"
But her tears were shed in vain and her every word was lost
In the rumble of an engine and the smoke from his exhaust

He took off like the Devil; there was fire in his eyes
He said "I'll go a thousand miles before the sun can rise."
But he hit a screamin' diesel that was California-bound
And when they cleared the wreckage, all they found

Was his black denim trousers and motorcycle boots
And a black leather jacket with an eagle on the back
But they couldn't find the 'cicle that took off like a gun
And they never found the terror of Highway 101

Excused Boots and Heavy Breathing?

Alan England Airframe Fitter

At summer camp I was put on light duties as I had a problem with my ankle. Some of the entry thought I was a skiver as I never had to help with "Lavender Dan" and the thunder buckets, nor peel those mountains of spuds that miraculously appeared every morning, nor go on that route march on that scorching hot day.
However on the last day at camp I was taken off light duties and put to humping all the baggage. Needless to say this did my ankle no good at all, which swelled up something alarming. On my return to Halton it took me nearly an hour to hobble down to Sick Quarters, from where I was quickly whisked away to hospital .I was released next day with my leg in plaster; it was found that my ankle had been fractured for the past six weeks.

So much for me skiving!!