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Editor: Master William Caxton of the
Worshipful Company of the Merchant Venturers
Address:
Treason in
Government reels as blood
flows in
This morning of May 11th,
shortly before the Privy Council was due to convene in the
"Thank you, William! The
first thing I must say is that all official reports say the King is alive and
in full health. But for a while today, many thought Prince Edward and the King
kidnapped or killed amidst chaos that has shocked observers.
This morning, while preparing
for a meeting of the Privy Council in the
Fuelled by paranoia and the
fog of war, cries of 'to arms' flew up everywhere. Then I saw most of
Pembroke's men were wearing Royal livery and, with many Royal Household
men-at-arms on the ground, things were very confused. You could cut the tension
with a knife.
I saw men in
Pembroke (with men in Royal
livery) took the lead in assaulting the government forces while the defenders
in the Upper Bailey seemed to lack direction, though the earls of Arundel and
Worcester took charge of the Round Tower and courtyard, and the Duke of Norfolk
seems to have defended the Royal suites. With all contingents frantically
arming amid rumours on both sides of death, murder and kidnap. Arundel's men held the North stair supported by the Norman
Gate, no doubt in return for Arundel's earlier support against
But then the earls of
The fighting was hard but
conducted according to the rules of chivalry, as far as I can tell. However,
the situation looked hopeless for the defenders and with lords Bohun and Sudeley
going down in the thickest of the fighting, the first few began to yield and
ransom talks merged into peace talks. The earls of
Eventually the earls of
Servants hastily erected a
pavilion in the midst of the courtyard (those about previously having suffered
in the fighting). The dukes of Buckingham and Norfolk, the Earl of Pembroke and
the Bishop of Winchester met for an hour. I saw the Duke of Norfolk, a dramatic
figure soaked in blood with his arm in a sling echoing the state of the Kendal
and Beaumont retinues; evidence of fighting around the Royal apartments, their
ghastly appearance fuelling speculation regarding the King's health. (
We cannot know what was
said in that very tense hour but the negotiators emerged with the following
consensus agreement proclaimed with the authority of King and Council.
1) The King, Queen and
Prince of Wales are alive, in perfect physical health and in no current danger
whatsoever.
2) Everyone must stop
fighting and put aside their arms.
3) The King commands that
only Privy Councillors by right of office are to remain within Windsor
castle.
4) The Earl of Pembroke is
to withdraw to Wales.
5) All noble retinues are
to be reduced: dukes to 100 men, earls 75, lesser peers 30 and knights 5.
6) The dukes of Buckingham
and Norfolk will replace the current Household with 50 men from each of their
affinities.
7) The Privy Council will
meet as soon as the Lord Chancellor and Lord Treasurer can attend to hear
'evidence' (some use the word 'allegations') from the Duke of Norfolk.
8) The Court of Chivalry
is to hear all purely military disputes arising from today's violence at some
future date.
9) Other grievances will
be heard at some future date by a panel of arbitrators chaired by the President
of the Council.
The suspicions of the Queen's men regarding
members of the government (and vice versa) seem to have started the dispute;
both sides claiming to guard the King against alleged kidnap. However there can
be no doubt that the concentration of arms
within a confined space was a major cause and all express relief that the King
is safe and most of the men-at-arms dismissed.
Lord Bohun is dead and
Lord Sudeley is not expected to last the night; the Earl of Oxford is also
hurt, not to mention many worthy knights. But questions need to be asked. Are
the rumours true that the King, while physically unharmed, has suffered a
relapse of his old trouble? (If true, it will lend credence to the late Duke of
One thing is certain,
today's events are sure to be a polarising influence on all present and many
elsewhere.
Stop Press!
The forces ordered out of
Welcome news has arrived of a
surprise victory against the Scots, the office of the Privy Seal releasing the
following excerpt from the official report from the battlefield to the King by
the Earl of Northumberland, dated May 9th.
"My Lord, first news of
a great victory over the Scots! After taking many of our Northern Castles the
Scots met with us on a field south of the
Unconfirmed reports indicate
that Viscount Carlisle is bringing King James south to safe custody while Percy
remains in the field to recover the castles taken by the Scottish King before
being brought to book. His close advisors say he will dismiss a large part of
his army to reduce the cost to the state and besiege Norham, Wark and Roxburgh
with the Scots own cannon.
As well as much booty and
many mundane ransoms, the Scots artillery train is also reputed to have been
recovered in full. The earls of Argyle, Angus and Huntly are also reported
captured. The ransom of King James alone is estimated at over £20,000.
Further reports arriving as
we go to print claim Percy has already retaken
Business News
News of the Berwick victory
caused a sharp rise in shares yesterday, King James' capture created a
decade-high spike in government bonds and tallies. However, reports of renewed
recruiting and today's news from Windsor slashed shares to the bone as the City
seeks to get rid of what's seen as 'bad' tallies. "Cor, luv a duck!"
commented Mayor Lee, "just when we fort it wuz all gerrin betta, ver nobs
all start batterin each uvver agin. When's it gonna stop? Vat's wot I arsk! Wot
abaht ver merchants? Wot vis country needs is stubblity."
Other Home News
Recent banditry in Essex and
Gloucester should be blamed on corrupt sheriffs, according to Lord Harington,
"Sheriffs in the pay of local magnates are the problem. They bend the
King's justice to serve powerful lords. Thankfully the Duke of Somerset is
quashing abuses under the previous Chancellor of Cornwall in Devon, but it's
still a problem in other counties."
Even before news broke of the
Windsor mayhem, the West Country and Midlands reported renewed troop-raising.
A leaked private report on
the plight of Leicester speaks of over 500 dead and lists damage to buildings,
especially the eastern quarter. Of particular infamy is the looting of the
tombs of the King's ancestors: Henry Earl of
Lord Delaware has released
two retainers of the Earl of Essex and withdrawn his accusations of spying.
"According to the Earl," he said, "they are 'scouts'."
"They were on routine Treasury duties;" the Earl replied, "spies
don't wear livery!"
The Captain of the King's
ships has deployed a large fleet of 20 warships between Calais and Dover and is
patrolling the Channel prior to cruising the East Coast in search of pirates.
Foreign News
A fine stained glass window
has been commissioned for Dublin Cathedral to commemorate the late Duke of
York. The window features a full-length representation of 'Ricardus Dux', in
armour, bearing the sword of justice and the Great Seal of Ireland as Lord
Lieutenant. The chief armorial reference is the black dragon of Ulster but the
white rose of York and the white lion of March also feature. This impressive
window has been paid for by public subscription raised on the initiative of the
Earl of Desmond who said “The late Duke of York was a mighty prince, a good man
and a worthy steward of Ireland for His Grace the King. We in Ireland will
surely miss him.”
It
is confirmed that King Charles IV of Navarre has died of poison. His successor
is Gaston de Foix, Earl of Kendal, a close in
Observers of the political
situation in the Iberian peninsular see the new King's words as hinting at a
possible request for support against Aragon, with whom Navarre has a
long-running history of wars and the late King Charles is alleged to have been
poisoned, having been recently released from imprisonment by his father, King
John II of Aragon.
Political observers closer to
home question the significance of King Gaston's failure to mention the Queen.
He has been close to her since 1446, serving as her 'chivalric champion', but
his parting words mention only her husband, King Henry, and call into question
'chivalric romances', of which until now, he has been a major exponent. Perhaps
King Gaston has had a rude introduction to modern 'realpolitik'.
The court of the Lord High Admiral of England came to prominence a century ago and is the
tribunal used to deal with causes arising at sea. It is not confined to matters
of naval warfare, and indeed it is very frequently resorted to by merchants in
disputes involving breach of contract, fraud and negligence. Because it is
universally acknowledged that the common law courts can only deal with matters
arising within the boundaries of the realm, the Admiralty court operates on
Civil (ie: Roman) law principles. This meant that trial of causes is by
interrogation of the parties and relevant witnesses by the presiding officer,
with judgement given by the same officer and not by verdict of a jury. The
court is presided over by a judge of the Admiralty, usually a doctor of law,
that is to say, a graduate of a university with a formal education in Roman as
opposed to English law. The common law judges constantly strive to limit the court
of Admiralty, and both Richard II and Henry IV placed statutory curbs on the
court barring anyone from bringing an action that arose in the realm, even if
it is connected to the sea. Now anyone who attempts to sue in the admiralty
court contrary to these statutes can be prosecuted in the King’s Bench or the
Common Pleas. It remains a powerful weapon against pirates.
In times of peace the Court
of Chivalry is presided over jointly by the Constable and
the Earl Marshal, though in times of war the Constable can
act independently. This court also emerged in the last century as an important
venue for hearing cases relating to military matters. Its remit within this
sphere is broad, ranging from treason, prisoners of war, ransom, contracts with
suppliers of logistical support and supplies and disputed coats of arms. Again,
statutory controls imposed by Richard II limit the court’s powers to those
dealing with ‘deeds of arms and war’ and appeals of treason or felony committed
overseas. Cases that can be fitted into the emergent common law torts of debt
or assumpsit (breach of contract) have thus been removed from its jurisdiction.
Though the court’s power to summarily condemn traitors occasionally brings
accusations that it is in contradiction to Magna Carta, summary trial for
treason without a jury is licit when the law of arms prevails in times of open
warfare. This is especially the case when the treason is established as
manifest or based upon the king’s own record. There are, however, strict rules
for interpreting whether a state of open warfare exists and some form of formal
or informal licence from the Crown is needed for the Constable to act.
Court & Social
The Royal family remain at
home at Windsor and are expected to reduce public appearances as part of a
spiritual cleansing regimen leading up to Pentecost, May 24th. The
Queen has made public her intention to attend the wedding of Lady Beauchamp de
St. Amand and the Duke of Somerset on this day, after formally receiving her
ladies-in-waiting at Winchester Pentecost eve.
All requests for Royal
audience to be presented in writing one week in advance to the Duke of Norfolk
until further notice.
A Months Mind memorial
service for the late Duke of York will be held at the Collegiate Church at
Fotheringay June 1st in this Year of Our Saviour 1461. It is
intended to be a small, family affair but His Grace the King and the Privy
Council have decided to honour Duke Richard later in the year with a further
memorial service.
Further appointments to the
Privy Council have been delayed briefly pending discussions on a possible
cabinet reshuffle.
Births, marriages &
deaths
Died May 9th, King
Charles IV of Navarre, of poison. He is succeeded by Gaston de Foix, Earl of
Kendal.
Died May 11th,
Humphrey Lord Bohun, Sir Thomas Malinbridge, Sir Christopher Talbot and many
other worthy knights, of wounds received in the recent fighting at Windsor. Requiescat in pace!
Lonely Hearts
The wedding of the Duke of
Somerset and Lady Beauchamp de St. Amand is at Salisbury cathedral May 24th,
Pentecost.
The Earl of Pembroke has
license to marry Elizabeth
Many suitors are interested
in the hand of Elizabeth de Bohun, coheiress to the late Lord Bohun and, with
his death, soon to be a ward of Court. Lord Bohun's demise may render previous
negotiations moot but she can inherit on marriage.
A marriage is rumoured between
the Howard family and a ducal dynasty. If true, it won't be the first time; a
shrewd match earlier this century makes Sir Robert Howard coheir to the Mowbray
fortune unless Duke John gets himself an heir.
Finally, the most potentially
wealthy heiress in the land is to be courted by the most eligible bachelor. If
it goes through, the alliance may create an estate approaching the immense
Court Gossip
"When I
told the people of Ulster that I was the Son of York, a woman in the audience
stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the
Protestants in whom you don't believe?" - Earl of March to a crony over his ale.
"If absolute power corrupts
absolutely, where does that leave Essex?": Earl of March to a friend after reading his demands.
Overheard
in the West Country: "As my dad says, 'when you're in a
hole, son, keep digging!' - But then he is a miner."
"Maybe there is no actual
place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to Essex breath through
his nose when eating." - Worcester
to a friend after the Windsor feast!
"When did I realise I
was God? Well, I was praying and suddenly realised I was talking to
myself!" Essex muses with Herbert on
his amazing powers of deduction.
"My reputation grows with
every failure." - Norfolk
to a friend.
"The Yorkist
supporter is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness,
can be trained to do most things."
Oxford to Pembroke at the Windsor feast.
"I am free of all
prejudices; I hate all Lancastrians equally." Essex to Herbert.
"Last week I said
Hubert was the ugliest man I had ever seen. I have since seen Essex at last and
now wish to withdraw that statement."
- Lord Delaware to Grey of Wilton.
The Muckraker
Extracts
from a document found on a midden near Windsor by The Westminster Chronicle's own fearless investigative reporters…
Dear Diary: told Humpy and
Johnnie I was worried about what went on at Eton. Are the masters sufficiently
interested in the boys? Poor Johnnie had a fit of coughing and had to go out
and Humpy said he would look into the question. I do hope spiritual guidance is
not lacking at the College and I must send Johnnie some leeches…
Dear Diary: Humpy says he has
a plan to ensure the proper education of pupils not just at Eton but also at
all schools. It involves asking the bishops to ensure that all the masters know
their Lord’s Prayer backwards. I am not sure this is such a good idea but Humpy
seems to think it will solve all problems…
Dear Diary: tried reciting
the Lord’s Prayer backwards at confession. Bishop Booth wanted to know if I had
been bothering Margaret but of course I told him no. Now I am to have extra fasting
and a double dose of leeches…
Dear Diary: apparently we are
off to York soon. Humpy and Johnnie were discussing whether to stop over in
Leicester on the way. Of course, there has been a spot of bother there and
Humpy wants to send in 'non-governmental organisations' to put things right.
Johnnie laughed, saying that one could hardly rely on governmental
organisation. I didn’t get the joke and I don’t think Humpy did either because
he didn’t smile…
Dear Diary: everything has
been very confused at Windsor today. Humpy told the Officers of the Household
that he wanted to see 'target-setting' within their departments so archery
butts have appeared all over the place. One cannot walk down a corridor without
someone shooting at something. Even the cooks are at it! So many have injured
themselves or others and nothing is being done. Came to bed hungry and it is
not even a fast day!
Dear Diary: Humpy has told me
his plan to improve education in the schools is nearly finished. Once they have
been tested on their Lord’s Prayer, 'the three Rs' and other things, a 'league
table' will be published so everyone can see the results and the worst schools
will be 'named and shamed'. The best schools are to become watchtowers or
lights or some such. Frankly it seems rather odd. I don’t understand about the
watchtowers or what is so important about the letter R and Johnnie asked if the
schools weren’t teaching properly would anyone be able to understand the table?
It seems Humpy could do with some leeches…
Dear Diary: a curious event
happened this morning as I walked in the gardens at Windsor with Humpy and
Johnnie. A base fellow, working on the wall masonry, called out to us that it
was time for 'regime change'. Humpy looked rather startled but I waved and
called back “Yes, yes, we are all in favour of regimen change!” and frankly I
think it is time for a change! The bread and water diet I have been put
on - a 'detox regime' the physicians call it - is starting to get me down and
my humour certainly has not improved as they said it would. Anyway, Humpy
looked even more startled and sent some men after the mason, presumably so we
could continue our chat, but he had disappeared. Humpy told me I should not be
speaking to such types but I am sure Johnnie agreed with me because I think I
heard him murmur 'Amen' when I said I fancied a change. Poor Johnnie must also
be suffering with his regime – his humour has definitely been getting worse
lately…
Dear Diary: Oh dear! Humpy
has been explaining to me about regimes and changing them and I may have put my
foot in it again. It seems the mason has some sort of connection to that
comical sailor who once appeared at court (though I must say I did not spot any
similarity, so perhaps he is a cousin?) saying I was a bad king! I always thought
that was one of Dickie’s little pranks but Humpy says yesterday’s “incident” is
evidence of “a clear and present danger”, whatever that may mean! He wants to
publish a dossier on the subject and I said the boys at Eton love writing
stories and would probably be happy to help…
And let us not forget that our King is also renowned as a
poet.
I'm Henry VI, I am.
Henry VI, I am, I am.
I got married to a woman
from France;
In our family she wears
the pants.
And everyone wants to end
my reign:
The dukes and earls and
commoners and lords (yes, lords).
I'm the first plays
Shakespeare ever wrote --
Full of severed heads and
swords.
(Thanks to Victoria, who brought this to my attention. J)
Haute Cuisine
Several readers have asked
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add 4oz of granular sugar, the zest and juice of 3 whole lemons, half a pint of
dry white wine and a generous splash of brandy before getting a suitably
muscular servant (or a renaissance food stirring engine) to whip it vigorously
into soft peaks. Chill, serve and enjoy!
The Weather: Father Johannus
Predicts - 88% Accuracy!
Aside from a slight veer in
the wind, the weather has remained fine and mild for both the last two days
with the wind in the northeast - and tomorrow? Father Johannus says,
“Tomorrow’s weather will be just like today’s.”
Letters
(The Royal letter that ended today's fighting at Windsor.)
From his
Grace the King:
"I recommend me to
you and earnestly desire that, as you love your king and this realm, you shall
assist me in this gravest of circumstances. Howbeit that I hear rumours that
you have suffered a most grievous wound in the present fighting, I pray you
bear no malice when all that we have worked for stands upon a tickle point.
Earnestly desirous of an
amicable end to these sad events, His Grace the King and the most high and
noble Dukes of Buckingham and Norfolk are resolved to settle upon a parley in
the upper bailey, to be lead, guided and peaceably guaranteed by my lord Bishop
of Winchester, to discuss an immediate cessation of this folly of the mutual
destruction of the flower of the English peerage. To that end and in the hope
of securing that peace which we all plainly wish for, certain conditions and
requirements shall be made as follows:
Item: all hostilities to
cease forthwith.
Item: that
those men of my Lord of Pembroke's, my lord of Oxford's and my lord of
Shrewsbury's part, no matter what livery or outward sign they bear, shall
withdraw unto the lower bailey.
Item: those men of my lord
of Arundel's and my lord of Worcester's part, no matter what livery or outward
sign they bear, shall withdraw into the Round Tower.
Item: the men of my lord
of Wiltshire's part to remain within the royal apartments.
Item: those men of the
part of the noble dukes of Norfolk and Buckingham are to withdraw to their
existing quarters within the upper bailey. Those unable to so withdraw for
reasons of space are to remain in the Upper Bailey as far from the parley and
as close to their lords' lodgings as they may contrive.
Item: those men of the
part of any other lord, knight or captain not so mentioned heretofore shall
withdraw as they see fit to either the lower bailey or the Round Tower as likes
them best.
Item: no man of any degree
or condition whatsoever shall enter or attempt to enter the royal apartments
until further notice.
Item: any such attempt to
be regarded as an act of the utmost gravity and contempt of the personages of
the royal family.
Item: the gates of the
Norman tower to be opened, and to remain open for the duration of any parley
that may arise from these letters.
Item: the lords
Buckingham, Norfolk, Pembroke and the venerable bishop of Winchester, each
accompanied by one knight, to meet within a pavilion in the centre of the upper
bailey, there to discuss certain terms for the honourable and durable settling
of these late troubles and turmoils.
Item: the results of their
deliberations to be copied by scribes of the royal household indifferently
chosen and circulated to all peers and nobles present within these walls.
Item: those peers and
nobles not party to these talks shall have the right to send a written reply to
the aforementioned lords gathered in the upper bailey, which replies shall be
earnestly and honestly debated and discussed.
Item: at no point shall
any man of any degree whatsoever seek, or cause others to seek, to rekindle
hatred and rancour in the hearts of any so gathered within these walls, nor to
shed the blood of any further person, on penalty of life and limb for
endangering the lives of the most noble royal family and the peers of the
realm.
I pray you do all that is
in your immediate power to assist in this regard, so that we may end this
cursed enmity, and leave it to you to take such steps as are necessary to
ensure this parley is arrived at.
Given under the Signet:
Henry Rex, Buckingham, Norfolk"
Editor: it is hard to see how bloodshed broke out if
these are the true feelings of our monarch and his immediate officers. However,
it is noticeable that the two seals beneath the Royal Signet are those in direct charge of recent affairs in Council and do
not include any of the peers seen to be aggressors in the today's violence.
Perhaps it is a simple case of political jealousy, not unlike many accusations
over the last decade. Perhaps 'kidnap' is merely the new euphemism for 'evil
advice'. It seems discontent has not died with the 'old guard'.
I,
the Duke of Norfolk, write this, lying injured by an assassin working on behalf
of the Queen. This traitor knight, Sir Thomas Malinbridge, under her orders,
tried to end my life in Windsor. The fact that this has been given to you means
that the Queen's plans have gained fruit and I lie dead or dying. A plot most
evil, most vile, has emerged in Windsor, a plot to kill the King, to bring
England under foreign rule. It has emerged that the Queen plans to put the
Prince of Wales upon the throne, bringing a quick end to the King's rule. She
is aided in this matter by the Earl of Pembroke. I know that you are angry that
she has planned such a thing but, even worse, her plan is to bring our fair
nation under the rule of France. For she would rule England using her son's
name and through her, Charles of France would rule England as a puppet. In
Windsor, her first strike was to kill peers strong and loyal to the King, such
as myself. I make my stand here in Windsor; I have fought, shed blood and will
surely die within these walls. I do this in defence of the King and England. I
call on every man who loves the King and who loves England to rise up and stop
the vile traitor who poses as our Queen. God save England! God save the King!
Editor: this letter bears no seal but the style is
very much that of the Duke of Norfolk, albeit under stress. However, if true,
it creates a constitutional crisis. The Queen has always been an entirely
passive figure, acting only through the King as an extension of the King's
person; an executive Queen is entirely new. So if she acts to attack her
husband's subject and that subject defends himself, technically he is committing
treason. Moreover, if that subject is a foremost officer of the Crown, is not
the Queen herself guilty of treason? But to prosecute the case means to accuse
the Queen and by implication the King – again, treason! The resolution is for
the King to act in person as he alone cannot commit treason against himself.
Edward Duke of York, Earl of March,
Dear Editor, I am
beginning to wonder just how long I have been in Ireland. I thought it only a
matter of weeks, yet now I read of Her Grace the Queen’s reception at “St
George’s Chapel” in Windsor Castle [The Westminster Chronicle #23]. Is this a
reference to the old chapel that King Edward III of blessed memory rebuilt in
1350? Is it the privy chapel perhaps or maybe the Garter Hall, which, I
believe, is named for St George? Presumably a new building cannot have been
erected in this short space of time. Mind you, the name does has a certain ring
to it…
Editor: Congratulations, your Grace! Please accept my congratulations on
entering into your full title on receiving livery of your estate. You are correct in assuming the reference is
to the wooden chapel rebuilt by Edward III to service the Order of the Garter.
The order's patron is St. George so it would be embarrassing if the dedication
were not to him. Doubtless the King's clerk of works will note your Grace's
observation and rebuild in stone when feasible. I understand Henry V had plans
to do this but died, alas, before finalisation. Let us hope a replacement
chapel to this internationally renowned order of chivalry retains the overall
flavour of the current, which bears a certain resemblance to the lantern of Ely
cathedral (according to our architecture correspondent). In the mean
The Most
Noble Order of the Garter as of May 1461 with dates of investiture; (Gasc. =
Gasconese, Imp. = Imperial, Port. = Portuguese):
1425 Thomas
Lord Scales
1429
Humphrey Duke of Buckingham
1439 William
Lord Fauconberg
1439 Ralph
Lord Sudeley
1440 John
Viscount Beaumont
1445 John
Lord Beauchamp of Powicke
1445 Alvaro
Vasquez d'Almada Count d'Avranches (Port.)
1446 Sir
John de Foix Captal de Buch (Foix)
1447 King
Alphonso V of
1447 Sir
Francois Surienne Sire de Lunée (Gasc.)
1450 Richard
Lord Rivers
1450 Henry
Earl of
1450 John
Lord Berners
1457 Emperor
Frederick III (Imp.)
1457 John
Earl of
1457 Thomas
Lord Stanley
1457 Lionel
Lord Welles
1459 James
Earl of Wiltshire and Ormond
1459 John
Lord Dudley
1459 Jasper
Earl of Pembroke
Most recent
deaths: Richard Earl of Salisbury, Henry 'the Navigator' Duke of Viseu (Port.),
John Duke of Norfolk, Richard Duke of York.
Edward III founded
the Order to reward close friends who fought with him in France. A garter is
said to have fallen from his mistress's leg while dancing. The King picked it
up and in an act of gallantry to hide the lady's embarrassment, tied it round
his own leg speaking those words that were to become the motto of the Order:
"Honi soit qui mal y pense!" – "Evil be he who thinks
evil!" Garter knights wear an 8-point star bearing the cross of St George
suspended by a blue ribbon. Regarded as a great honour at home and abroad,
France and Burgundy have created rival orders in sincerest flattery.
Investiture is entirely at the King's pleasure, though typically he gives
preference to close relatives, major magnates and great soldiers. It is also an
instrument of foreign policy, used to entice would-be allies, illustrated by
the Portuguese and Gascon appointments in the 1440s, at a time of political and
military crisis abroad.
Edward Duke of York, Earl of March, Cambridge, Ulster and
Cork, Lord of Clare, Connaught, Leix and Trim to Edmund Earl of Rutland,
Margaret Plantagenet, Elizabeth Duchess of Suffolk, Katherine Dowager Duchess
of Norfolk, William Lord Hastings, Walter Lord Mountjoy, the Archdeacon of
London, the knights of the shire of Northamptonshire, officers of the Household:
On
behalf of my mother, my brothers, my family and myself I would most cordially
invite you to a memorial service to mark the death of Richard Duke of York. It
will take place in our Collegiate Church at Fotheringay in the County of
Northamptonshire on the 1st day of June in this the Year of Our
Saviour 1461.
I
appreciate that there are many things that can affect one’s travel plans
including the business and movement of the Court or events elsewhere in the
kingdom. I am sure that if you cannot be with us in person, you will remember
my father and his family in your prayers.
Editor: we will not forget.
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Rhetoric & Dancing
Classes: impress the ladies at court that, despite appearances, you are not
some border baron buffoon. Learn how to talk to a woman of rank and how to
perform the 'Burgundian Two Step' without tripping over your scabbard. Ask for
Gaston Le Marche on arrival in York.
For Sale!
Reminted Pledge Tokens.
For Essex on one side and For
Essex on the reverse. Going cheap. Contact Lord Treasurers Office.
Tarot Card set: imitation
Italian - ideal for those long winter evenings after Uncle Humphrey has told
all his best tales – Warning, do not take into the church or within ten yards
of a passing abbot!
New Ballads: 'Hal's Blue Eyed
Boy Prince, 'New Lancaster', 'Rack or Rouen? Part 4' and 'Ireland's Gain is
England's Bigger Gain' – Unavailable: 'Return of a Ragged Bear' and 'Lord
Turn-a-tabard'.
Lodgings for those attending
Parliament in York will be rationed to those who have a purse full of honest
gold. The local Abbeys will accommodate more on a donation to the Shrine of
Archbishop Scrope in York Minster.
Dagger Proof Vests: don't rely
on the honeyed words of your enemies - Guaranteed to deflect even those Italian
style stilettos.
Battlefield Memories: quality
artistic renditions of recent battles to keep or hang on a wall to keep out the
draft - Signed copies by Jan der Bootbosch - Extra fee if you want a drawing
showing yourself doing something heroic or slaughtering a particular enemy.
Inflatable pig bladders on a
stick: great for making a noise when whirled around in the wind - ideal for
getting your point across when Parliament meets in York.
Teeth - new stock: only the
best teeth extracted from the jaws of traitors, murderers and pirates. Each set
comes with certification on previous owner. Keep one in your medicine Box to
cure boils, sores, sweating sickness, gut rot and common colds - Can also be
used as love tokens, loved ones will adore you - Give them a molar – not a
ring.
Yorkist Paybooks: found in
Leicester after recent sack - make interesting reading - discretion assured. PO
Box 123. Mark all letters 'Lemme Look!!!'
Trinkets, Bells and Whistles:
recently retired Court Jester to sell his coat before embarking on crusade.
Announcements
Amazing cures at Pontefract:
visit the grave of Thomas of Lancaster, executed by King Edward II. Touch the
tomb and walk again – though not if you have just visited 'King Dickon's Ready
Eats'.
Breed again: the Tomb of King
Edward II at the Abbey of St. Peter in Gloucester promises to rejuvenate the
loins of all pilgrims. Anyone shouting 'I am only here for the Piers' will be
taken outside and exposed in the stocks for one day. (Free test ride in the
Abbot's brothel – money back if unsatisfied!)
Micklegate Tavern, York,
gives public notice that it will not serve anyone who supports or supported the
late Duke of York. So if you want serving remove your Yorkist badges.
The Bishop of Norwich
confirms the demon known as 'Dennis' has been dealt with. "The Demon had
been trapped in the body of a newt and in that earthly form it was buried in a
bottle deep inside the cathedral grounds to ensure it did not escape and take
flight in another bodily form." Sightings of giant newts have been put
down to the strong local brew.
What the Other Papers Say
'Courtly Love' magazine
apologies to readers deceived by a parody called 'Courtney Love'. This title is
produced in Devon by scoundrels in the pay of a certain Lord known for his
selective adherence to law and order. Lady Anna de Wintour, editor of Courtly
Love, has also confirmed that she will seek 'extreme satisfaction' on rival
title 'My Liege!' after it published sneaky illustrations from the coming Duke
of Somerset's marriage to Lady Beauchamp. The owner of 'My Liege!', Richard
'Dirty' Desmond, is famed for his white rose connections (though he has denies
any connection with the Irish Earl of the same name) and says he will slap
anyone with a gauntlet who accuses him of thieving. "Our illustration came
from a very reputable source. In fact I couldn't go any higher unless I was
sitting at God's Right Hand".
Florentine Renaissance Man'
has been refused accreditation by the authorities in York where they had wanted
to report on the proceedings of Parliament. Reasons for rejection were that
they are "filthy foreigners from a Republic of Bankers" and that the
'Westminster Chronicle' has an exclusive contract that lasts for the next 10
years unless editor William Caxton is convicted of a crime that carries at
least three days in the stocks.'
'Gobbledigook Magazine':
learn Latin and Greek with this 2,458 piece monthly part-work. Improve job
prospects by completing this easy-to-follow education in the languages of
learning and culture. Collect the full set and you could be a bishop!
Introduction to Double-Dutch free with issue 1!
'Tiltyard' will not be the
name of the new merged magazine created after the bottom fell out of the
Tourney Business. As has been reported here before, 'International Tourney
Magazine' had to be closed after they overbid for the reporting rights for the
'International Bastard's Cup'. Their remaining assets and staff - those not
taken away by the bailiffs and debtors prison respectively - were bought by
'One Man and His Lance'. The new magazine is to be called 'Mount-Up &
Charge!'
'What Booty!' promises their
next issue will feature the latest spoils of war. The new editor is Darth
Raider whose motto is 'The Sword is Mightier than Any Quill Pusher!'
Campaign Matters
I know, I know! A 6-month
adjudication for just a 2-day turn! The reason is, of course, the events at
Windsor. Believe it or not, I never remotely considered anything like this
could happen. All the period fighting in real life was open field.
It was my opinion when I
first read all the orders concerned that the players concerned probably didn't
realise where it was going to lead. I had 2 choices: if it had been just one or
two, I would probably have contacted them and explained likely consequences but
since so many were involved (and it was a lot), I thought the best way forward
was to proceed on a phase-by-phase basis, giving e-mail updates of the current
situation so people had the opportunity to respond to rapidly changing events.
By my reckoning, we had 4 military 'phases' and several diplomatic exchanges.
This may not sound like a lot but splice in Christmas and RL and it ate up nigh
on 4 months. The residual 2 months doesn't look so bad but I sincerely hope
nothing like it ever happens again – try to keep all violence open-field, eh
guys? The system's much simpler then. Oh well, at least you get a bumper issue
of the Westminster Chronicle to celebrate our quarter century. J
Roel has dropped out as
Wydeville, partly due to the demands of his artistic career. Check out his
website at http://www.geocities.com/roelipilami/historicalart for an idea of what he can do. (Yup! He specialises in the
Wars of the Roses and takes commissions. I think he's pretty good but see for
yourself.)
They say the first casualty
of war is the truth but Rosewar's not far behind. Keef has been invited to
partake of the real-life wargame going on in Iraq as you read this and I'm
bloody annoyed at the loss of a fine player. Keef's orders were always a
delight to read and he made Mowbray a political heavyweight and a front-runner
in the league tables despite losing his first character to natural causes. I'll
miss him.
Keef's replacement as
Mowbray is Kevin Simpson while Lee Brewer steps in as Wydeville. I hope you'll
all make both of them very welcome. Remember they've got a lot to get their
minds around so go easy, OK? Especially with Mowbray. J
Livery
Badges: this is for real! If you think you would like an individually handmade
copy of your character's livery badge in silver, contact Toby Whitty (Beaufort)
by 'phone or e-mail to discuss details.
General Chat
Well with 6 months,
there's a lot of news to relate. Firstly, the London trip was loads of fun. As
well as Duncan and Ralph, Robert (York) and Steve (Herbert, ex-York) showed up
and we introduced everyone to The Game of Britain, proving that the simplest
games are the most fun. We also took the time to see the British Museum,
Westminster Abbey, the Foreign & Commonwealth Office (you wouldn't believe
it), the Banquet Hall, HMS Belfast (even more awesome than the last time I saw
her in the 70s) and the Tower of London. Thanks for a great time, guys. We must
do it again soon. J
In October, we spent our 5th
anniversary in the Lake District where by chance we saw an amazing film,
'Memento', about a guy who can't make new memories trying to avenge his wife's
death. The film is shot in reverse, which sounds like a gimmick but it isn't;
it's brilliant!
But we didn't visit the
Lakes to watch late-night cable TV. We also explored Grizedale Forest (which
I've long wanted to but never found the time) and visited Sizergh Castle, the
family home of the Stricklands since time immemorial. You can make out the line
of the original tower but it's mostly an 18th Century country home.
We also visited the Lakeland Aquarium where Claire fell in love with an otter
who certainly played to his audience.
We spent the New Year with
Bill and Louise (Tiptoft) at their country cottage in Ardnamurchan (furthest
left hand side of Scottish mainland). It's a bugger to get to but wonderful
when you do and it was my first visit to the Highlands. We took a walk to
Mingarry Castle, (which happened to be on TV last week in 'Wreck Detectives')
and had a wonderful New Year.
To show that irony still
rules the universe, we arrived to find both Claire and Louise had identical
surprises. Apparently Rosewar gains a further two dynasties in early August.
Ours is to be called Rhiannon – all offers for her hand in writing, if you
please – and don't stint the jointure, remember she's sole heiress to the
Stevens mortgage. J
After Christmas, we paid a long overdue
visit to Wingfield Manor, Derbyshire - Cromwell's
magnificent palace, largely financed by massive embezzling during his ten-year
tenure as Lord Treasurer. Since most sources barely mention it, I expected
ruined walls, foundations and mounds…so tall walls and towering chimneys
surprised me.
However, the complete lack
of parking (unheard of at an EH site), the landrover partially blocking, and
the river flowing over, the potholed access road and the poorly signed
electrified fence that you're forced to brush against while forging passage
made me feel someone didn't want us there.
The farmer whose property
envelops the entire site seems more than a little hostile to tourists and it's
this one man's intransigence that prevents Wingfield Manor from being one of
the brightest jewels in EH's crown.
The place is technically a
ruin, partially thanks to Oliver Cromwell (a very distant relation of the
original builder) who had it slighted despite it being a Parliamentarian
stronghold for much of the ECW and no more fortifiable than any other palace.
But if, like I did, you expect tumbled masonry, prepare yourself for a very
pleasant shock.
Basically, the roof is missing
and, of course, all the wooden bits, like floors, have rotted away, but the
stone fabric itself is pretty much how it ever was, rising to near enough the
full height at all points - even the chimneys still stand high, many once the
stone supports for the lesser wooden buildings of the inner courtyard.
The Great Hall is
magnificent, clearly intended for Ralph Lord Cromwell to impress the shire
gentry and even magnates with his wealth, power and influence. The audio-guide
takes you round the complex, explaining everything clearly with only a little
deviation into dramatisations, just enough to lend atmosphere.
You also get to see the
kitchens, including the best preserved pair of bread ovens I've seen, and Lord
Cromwell's own private rooms, later used by Mary Queen of Scots on whom a later
Earl of Shrewsbury was more than a little soft.
The place is wonderful and
I admonish everyone to visit as soon and as often as possible. Take your
friends, family, people you meet on the street. Take picnics and make a day of
it! As many people as possible and maybe one day the farmer will see some
sense.
Then in March we went to
Paris again. Oh, the art, the history, the architecture – the food! The
Mona Lisa was a disappointment but my highlight was stumbling over the tomb of
Philip de Commynes in the Louvre.
