The Latest Quotes from turn 26

"He has a lot of well-wishers; they would all like to throw him down one."- Essex to Herbert about Norfolk.

 

"Maidenhead…a principal bridging point over a minor obstruction known locally as the Thames."a geography lesson from the Earl of Warwick.

 

"We think of you when we are lonely. Then we are content to be alone." – Lady Sudeley replying to a letter from Lord Essex.

 

"…there are dark forces at work in the realm…"Talbot the mystic prognosticator.

 

"He is as strong as an ox and almost as intelligent."an anonymous peer about the Earl of Devon.

 

"…your right worshipful Mayor…appears to failed his comprehension tests at grammar school."Warwick criticising the education system.

 

"Don't you realise that there are enough people to hate in the world without you working so hard to give them another?" – Herbert to Essex after their escape from Windsor.

 

"…Sing as we used to sing it near 3000 strong,…" – as sung by the Warwick retinue in Berkshire.

 

"If we were to kill everyone who hates Arundel, it wouldn't be murder; it would be genocide!" Somerset discussing Arundel with Warwick.

 

"And whither I go ye know, and the way ye know." – Bishop Grey of Ely quoting John 14:4 during the memorial service in the late Duke of York's month's mind ceremony.

 

"This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot!"Talbot discussing the sheriff of Gloucester with his brother, Sir Humphrey.

 

"He only works when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap!" – overheard between the King and Queen while discussing Lord Essex's attitude to the Treasury.

 

 

Old favourites

Real people from the time:

"I have other sons!" - Lord Stanley upon Richard III threatening to kill his son, Lord Strange.

"He raises a fox that will one day devour his chickens." - Charles VII of France upon hearing that Duke Philip the Good had given refuge in Burgundy to the Dauphin Louis.

 

From the game, Turn 1:

"I want some information on the darker side of life.....what is involved in getting Lionel into the clergy?" - Lord Rivers.

 

Turn 3:

"In the case of women and children, some pretence at an accident should be arranged." - a character who shall remain nameless.

 

Turn 5:

"We must commend Richard Plantagenet for his efforts to mediate" - King Henry VI.

".....the treacherous ex-Duke of York....." - Queen Margaret.

"I'm playing it 'nice monarch/nasty monarch." - attributed to Vic, the Lancaster player.

 

Turn 7:

"How was I to know that Mary was a double-agent who gave me an apparently forged document, knowing that I'd attack Bonville." - Earl of Devon's explanation to his captors for his violent behaviour. (Mary is Lord Bonville's daughter.)

 

Turn 9:

"Your spies cost £4 5s 10d, this week." - one player's results.

"I will tie Elisabeth to the bed and whip her.....then removing my codpiece....." - Lord Greystoke upon arriving home from the wars with Scotland.

 

Turn 10:

"You're taking this all so personally, Bourchier" - attributed to Queen Margaret, in a phone conversation with the Earl of Essex over the execution of Sir Henry Bourchier.

 

Turn 12:

"I will be attending Parliament. I want John to meet me in London with the cannon and our new gunner. I wish to attempt to influence the counties of Lancashire, Derbyshire, Leicestershire, Lindsey, Staffordshire and the North and West Ridings." - one peer demonstrating faith in power politics and long range gunnery

 

Turn 13:

"I shall come down very heavily indeed upon anyone found in possession of illicit sheep...for personal use or for sale." - Lord Herbert on his soap box.

 

Turn 17

"Wallachian Stake Sharpener: Handy instrument to use if impaling catches on in England. Apply to the Earl of Worcester."Another advertisement, apparently libelling the Earl of Worcester.

"...whilst 'Joan of Anjou' invades England with her French cronies..." - The 'Friends of the Government' displaying a pretty wit.

 

Turn 18

"I either want less corruption or more chance to participate in it!" - Overheard in a conversation between the Duke of York and Sir John Fortescue, Lord Chief Justice on the subject of corruption.

"It's time for an heir, Isobel, so brace yersel..." - Lord Stafford of Southwyk getting romantic.

"I half wish Duncan had taken Steve's head off actually, then as the senior government guy there I could have taken control of the kingdom, promoted myself up to a dukedom and any other family members up as far as possible and into government offices for maximum victory points..." - one player showing a fine appreciation for strategy.

 

Turn 19

"I insist they get the keys off the Dowager as regards the war chest...The Dowager is not to be physically harmed but if she has a pet, let that be placed in danger to help her concentrate!" - the Duke of York politely asking the Dowager Lady Hungerford for a donation to party funds.

"Despite the glamour she brought to the country, she was the worst thing to hit our shores since the French burned Southampton in 1377" - the Earl of Essex on Queen Margaret's financial nous.

"Hmm! Thinking about disguised organ guns...could come in handy to get out of any future 'Council meeting surprises'." - a Privy Councillor considering his options.

"We can't allow nobles to kill innocents and get away with it!" - the Earl of Oxford suggesting novel judicial reform.

 

Turn 20

"I, King Henry VI of England...hereby temporarily relinquish my sovereign rights of allegiance..." - Henry proving he's taken leave of his sanity.

"By the powers invested in me as Lord Protector..." - York taking advantage of his sovereign's madness.

"I saw a terrible boar slavering about the land and terrifying the people most sorely until it was cast down by the horns of the good yale." - Father Alcuin after overdosing on the magic mushrooms.

"Death never takes a wise man by surprise." - Lord Herbert's alleged last words.

"...a peer of the realm and president of the council to boot, should not stoop so low as to smear the Kings wife, Her Majesty the Queen: lords, bishops, lesser men, yes, but not the King's wife." - Talbot showing a fine appreciation for propriety.

"...the Earl of Essex...is as erudite as he is prudent." - incredibly, this was the Queen.

 

Turn 21

"No more Mr Niceguy!" - Courtenay rueing his soft-soap approach to man-management.

"...no need for me to trouble the old trout..." - Beaufort referring to his aunt, Courtenay's mother.

"Politics is the art of choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable." Essex on who to side with!

 

Turn 22

"Given that I'm outnumbered 10:1, naturally I'm going to attack!" and "Sufficiently advanced military tactics are indistinguishable from witchcraft" and "Let's give the haggis eaters a taste of good English steel! Greystoke Forever!" - Greystoke considering his strategy against the Scots while suffering a rush of something to the head.

"If I had more men I would have avenged this insult. I'll have his head for this." - Essex on hearing of Talbot's siege of Gloucester castle.

The Earl of Northumberland on matters ecclesiastical: "I have to believe in the Apostolic Succession. There is no other way of explaining the descent of the Archbishop of Canterbury from Judas Iscariot."

Oxford and Arundel on the great poets - Oxford: "I believe I could write like Chaucer, if I had a mind to try it." Arundel: "Indeed, nothing wanting but the mind."

Essex discusses York with a friend - "He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend; provided, of course, he really is dead."

 

Turn 23

 “…poor old Buckingham plods along in his hopelessly old-fashioned way.” – believe it or not, the Duke talking about himself.

 

“Essex is under my personal protection and, in the end, he is to be treated honourably.” – Buckingham protecting his Treasurer.

 

Can't you see the very important distinction between Buckingham's partisan use of royal money and Essex's? – a player poses an important question.

 

“…death is never a good thing for any one or any purpose.” – Talbot philosophising.

 

“As free, and not using your liberty for a cloak of maliciousness, but as the servants of God. Honour all men. Love the Brotherhood. Fear God. Honour the King.” – the First Epistle of Peter, chapter II, verses 16/17; the text for Bishop Neville’s sermon on the sanctity of kingship.

 

 

Turn 24

“He spread so much happiness wherever he went…” - Bishop Kemp of London bemoaning the death of the archdeacon of Essex, Zanobius Mullakyn.

 “I will not rest until Edinburgh itself is ablaze.” - the Earl of Northumberland on his plans for the Scots – let's face it, he has experience.

“I am ready to sharpen my sword on Saracen heads if the Lord Northumberland leads us.” – Herbert betraying a worryingly poor grasp of, among other things, geography.

 

"I for one will not bow to the demands of a peer whose hands are tarnished with the blood of English commoners and who travels without the Grace of God…" An unidentified angry voice heard through the doors of the Privy Council chamber at Windsor.

 

 

Turn 25

"Are the masters [at Eton] interested in the boys?" – The King, ostensibly, to his closest advisors.

 

"When I told the people of Ulster that I was the Son of York, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?" - Earl of March to a crony over his ale.

 

"If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave Essex?": Earl of March to a friend after reading his demands.

 

"Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to Essex breath through his nose when eating." - Worcester to a friend after the Windsor feast!

 

"When did I realise I was God? Well, I was praying and suddenly realised I was talking to myself!" Essex muses with Herbert on his amazing powers of deduction.

 

"My reputation grows with every failure." - Norfolk to a friend.

 

"I am free of all prejudices; I hate all Lancastrians equally." Essex to Herbert.

 

 

 

Turn 26

"You cannot make a revolution with silk gloves, some times a blunt object is required"- Essex to Herbert after escaping from Windsor.

 

"All my life I've wanted to be 'someone'; I guess I should have been more specific." - Herbert to a close friend.

 

"We are discreet sheep; we wait to see how the drove is going, and then go with the drove" - Arundel to his aides.

 

"As the King is indisposed, it is left to Us to present the truth of the recent events at Windsor, as We understand them."the Queen explaining the events of May 11th.

 

"…you should be aware that we have ships in the Channel…" – the sinister Earl of Warwick menaces the London merchants.

 

"I read the account of the troubles at Windsor and was surprised to see that I had been painted a villain of sorts." – a bemused Talbot on reading his issue 25 of the Westminster Chronicle.

 

"But surely, if he cut himself shaving it would be his neck that would be bleeding?" the King to the Queen.

 

"That was the general idea, yes!"the Queen's alleged reply.

 

"…at 04.30hrs July 18th … Rhiannon Jane Turrell Stevens came into the world…" – well I thought it worth quoting. J